really saved David’s ass that time because I had my sister set up a demonstration and give Sharon and four other chicks free makeovers. I had to stop messing with David after that, though, because he expected me to take more risks like that one. He figured I could get us out of anything, like I was a genie, like I walked around with a rabbit in my hat or some shit. I had to explain to him that I was lucky only that one time, and besides his wife was hood just like him. I wasn’t tryin’ to walk outside one day and see my car all keyed up with my windows busted and my tires flat. Fuck that.
But back to Carlos, my week-old romance. I was going in the ladies’ room, and he was coming out of the men’s room. We locked eyes for a moment, and then we each went our separate ways. All through dinner I kept looking around the restaurant trying to find the man from the bathroom. Apparently, it was a mutual thing. We made eye contact again and signaled to meet back at the restrooms. I slid him my number and returned to my booth with David.
I got a phone call the next day. Carlos and I talked on the phone for hours, feeling each other out. He told me right away about his wife. I usually bypassed conversations about the wife, but I was curious this time. I asked Carlos why did he ever pursue me if he was married. He told me that he and his wife were having problems, and he was simply looking for something different. He said he was just unhappy and bored with his love life. He was looking for some excitement, and he said he and his wife would soon be divorcing.
Monica slammed the diary shut. She could not believe what she was reading. After a minute, she started laughing to herself uncontrollably. She figured somebody was playing games with her, trying to mess up her marriage. Me and my husband are absolutely happy. This jealous bitch don’t know what she’s talkin’ about. She should have really got her facts straight before she tried to pull one on me. I have to call Rita and tell her about this shit.
“Well, hello, there. How was Marco Island? Did you fulfill all your fantasies?” Rita sang into the phone.
“Hey, Rita. I had a wonderful time. And I still got some bones to pick with you, miss. Keeping a secret like that from me. I’m shocked!”
“Believe me, it wasn’t easy. I still got blisters from biting my tongue,” Rita said.
“Well, anyway, I’ll have to tell you about the trip later, but guess what I got in the mail?” Monica began.
“If you anything like me, bills and cheap thrills.”
“Oh, but this is the best cheap thrill you gonna ever hear about.”
“What?”
“Why did some chick send me one of Carlos’s sweatshirts—”
“What?” Rita butted in.
“Wait. Hold up. That’s not it. Underneath the shirt was a diary,” Monica continued.
“A diary?”
“Yes. At first I thought it was something from Carlos because he’s been in this surprising mood lately, and it didn’t have a return address on it. But I opened the diary and started reading, and it’s a woman talking about messing around with people’s husbands. And not only that: my husband is one of them.”
“You lyin’,” Rita gasped.
“Rita, I lie to you not. But the funny thing about it is she’s talkin’ about stuff that ain’t true. Like for instance,” Monica started to explain as she opened the diary, “she talks about how Carlos told her we’re having problems and on the verge of divorce.”
“Oh, well, there you have it. It’s a prank. You know like I know, for every one happy woman there’s one thousand miserable ones just waiting to take her place,” Rita concluded. “I would like to know which miserable one is bold enough to send some shit to your home. She don’t say her name in there anywhere?”
Monica began to scan the pages in search of the woman’s identity.
Her voice was muffled as she read aloud, “ ‘September 20th, 2000—’ ”
Rita cut her off, “2000! She’s talkin’ about