waved his hands in front of him . “No, no, no wait! I can’t make my whole fist do it! Just my finger. All I can manage is a menacing poke.” He poked at the air with his glowing digit.
I rubbed my hands over my face. I couldn’t tell if I was more disappointed or exasperated. “You live in the Under World. Isn’t your whole purpose down there supposed to sit around coming up with more effective ways to be evil? No offense but what the heck else do you have to do ?!”
They exchanged determined looks and resolute nods that made my eyes roll. It was Eddie that enthused, “We’re the Dark Army Glee Club!”
I pressed my fingers against my throbbing temples hard. “The Dark Army what?”
“ Glee Club!” Answered Boil Face. “You know, like the TV show? We love it! That’s where we got the idea.”
“I even shaved my head to look just like Puck!” Eddie tipped his head down and gestured to the mohawk.
I held up one finger to interrupt him . “First of all, Puck is hot. You look nothing like him. Second, are you friggin’ kidding me right now ?!”
“Nope. No joke.” Boil Face declared. “We aren’t a recognized club, but we meet almost every day to practice. We’re getting pretty good, too. Wanna hear something?”
Together they began, “ Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world …”
“ STOP!” I barked. “How is it that an army hell bent on world domination has a Glee Club?”
Red ’s eyes widened in an expression of genuine alarm. “Oh, the others don’t know about it. If they found out we’d probably be flogged—or worse.”
“We’re rebels!” Came the muffled voice of the twin with his head partially hidden behind his brother.
I stifled a grin. “Oh, obviously.”
Red shook his hand and blew on his finger. “It’s kind of weird though that she sent us after you . You’re famous in the Under World, especially after the way you took out Barnabus. No one really liked him. But to send us of all people after the Conduit ? Guess everyone else was busy.”
I snapped to attention. “She? She who?”
All five of their pasty faces went ashen . Their jaws hung slack at the slip up.
“She? There’s no she.” Eddie was just about the worst liar ever.
I thought back to the tale Alaina had weaved for me of how Barnabus gained power. He had sought out the help of a former woman of stature that had been chased into exile because of her dealings with the dark arts. Could it be? I narrowed my eyes and took a step closer. They all cowered back. “By chance did you mean the Countess? And that would be the same sorceress that helped Barnabus turn himself and his army into demons, correct?”
When they didn’t answer right away I took another step forward. Squeals rose up as I backed them into the cement wall.
“Yes! Yes! Please don’t hurt us!” A twin shouted.
“Is she running the show now?”
“No.” Red tried to deny in a weak whine of a voice.
T wo strides forward, and I pulled my arm back to strike. The “hiding” twin tried to scurry further behind his brother. They spun in a circle before landing in a heap on the ground.
“Wait, wait, wait!” Red pleaded. He held his hands held up for mercy. “You’re right, okay? It’s the Countess. She’s been in charge ever since Barnabus enlisted her help. She tried to talk him out of going up against you himself. But he wouldn’t listen. So, she refused to let him take the army with him. She made him face you alone and he died because of it. That’s all I know, I swear! Please don’t hit me, I bruise like a peach!”
“And scream like a girl.” I added.
I often wondered why Barnabus came after me alone. Now I knew. It hadn’t been by choice. The power hungry ex-soldier lost control of his own army. My gaze wandered over the ragamuffin demonic group before me. They seemed