Emily Taylor - The Teenage Mum by Vi Grim Read Free Book Online

another wink. 'Don't worry, us slugs have as much
interest in watching humans making babies as you do in seeing slugs
mate. That is of course with the exception of David Attenborough,
who's too nosey for his own good. Us slugs have been arguing with
Zeus about whether we'll let him come up here and have resorted to
a disinformation campaign to keep him out. Otherwise we won't be
able to enjoy a good shag for the next ten thousand years for fear
he has set up hidden cameras and catch us in action, yellow on
yellow.'
    The
slugs are funny without even
trying; I do like them, even if they are nosey.
'Anyway,' continues
Castor, 'your secrets are safe with Pollux and me. Do make sure
that you visit him sometimes. He gets so jealous when you do all
the sneaky stuff with me.'
    With a click of
my fingers , I arrive in
Pollux’s moon, and give him a peck on the cheek. I like him too,
and what's more I need to stay on side with these sentry
slugs.
A minute later I'm back
on my sofa thinking about how I can get David Attenborough up here.
We could have fun together trying to catch the slugs at it, yellow
on yellow. I haven't even managed to see one in my lettuce patch
yet so we'll have to be ever so sneaky.

 
     
     
7
     
Spring is in the air. The
birds start their dawn chorus even before the sun comes up. They're
too cheerful too darn early and I get up and slam the window shut.
The compost from the slimeball has made the soil super fertile and
my garden is flourishing; it’s full of tall weeds. With so much
happening since Christmas I haven't spent enough time in the
garden. Now it's spring, I need to get out there and get it
planted. Top of the list is lettuces for the slugs followed by
carrots for Trigger. I need to feed me for the next year; I’ll
plant potatoes, onions and carrots, and green beans and peas and
pumpkins, red peppers and tomatoes. Yummy things too, like
strawberries and raspberries. There's so much to do.
I should be spending a
few hours a day out there digging and weeding, composting and
planting, but I’m not. There's a lot of catching up I do if I'm not
going to be going hungry this year.
Jesus and Azziz and a team of
zinodes very kindly come and help and we spend a couple of days
getting it dug over and planted out.
I'm grumpy with myself
for having left it for so long and are all out of sorts. I've got a
splitting headache and snarl and grumble at my volunteers. I'm
surprised I don't chase then away. I wouldn't put up with me if I
was them. Normally they work with me, now they're all down the far
end of the garden, planting potatoes and celery and staying as far
away from my storm cloud as they can get.
     
Maybe I just need a break from
Camillo. I could go to Juno and stay with Freud but Janice's offer
to come to Zwingly and learn to sing is much more tempting. I put
on my sexy green knickers and summer dress, pack my bag and wander
along the beach to see Azziz.
'Zwingly?' I say.
'Zwingly,' answers Azziz. 'I'm
not sure you are grown up enough to visit Zwingly.'
'You had a big party to
celebrate my womanhood and now I'm too much of a baby to go visit
Zwingly.' I snarl. I am a grumpy guts at the moment.
'Alright, alright,' says Azziz.
'But do behave, there's some very charming people there.'
I can't see that being a
problem. I'm no push over. Jesus and Azziz are very charming and
they are people some the time. I've resisted their charms so far.
No problem at all. Well not much anyway!
     
Azziz holds my hand and says,
'Let's go, we'll start in the town of Mos Eisley.'
    We arrive in
the desert on the fringes of a town made of rundown concrete
buildings and mud brick houses. The roar of space ships and
fighters coming and going from the town's spaceport is deafening.
The ground shakes as they pass low overhead and zoom off into
space. Walking into town along the rough dirt streets, we dodge
around space scooters and groups of aliens on foot. There's an
atmosphere of menace hanging in the air, like when the