Every Happy Family by Dede Crane Read Free Book Online Page B

and gives one to the cup. He also could have said accuse or stews. He wanted a drink.
    Jehoy-something turns over a ten and makes index-fingers horns on his head. Quinn remembers, too late, that horns stand for Viking and therefore is the last person to pretend to row the imaginary Viking ship. He drinks and adds the rest of his glass to the cup.
    â€œYou’ll get the hang of it,” says Vanessa with another pat to his knee.
    Quinn’s the only person with a full glass when Todd turns over a five – a “make-up-a-rule” card. He takes one look at Quinn and proclaims, “Chug time,” and everybody downs the remainder of their glass. Quinn knows Todd’s watching him and knocks his drink back in one go.
    His self-consciousness deliciously fades to white noise, so when Ritchie calls a time out to use the bathroom, Quinn has enough careless confidence to ask Vanessa about her holiday plans.
    â€œHome to Calgary for the dysfunctional Christmas,” she says with a meagre smile. “My parents are divorced and can’t be in the same room together. One brother’s a geological engineer who works for an oil company and one’s a radical environmentalist, so they can’t be in the same room either. My sister’s a paranoid schizophrenic. Though she claims that’s just my projection.”
    â€œGod, I’m sorry. That sounds seriously tough,” he says and means it.
    She shrugs. “Gotta love family. Yours?”
    â€œParental unit still together, brother and sister like this.” He holds up crossed fingers. “I do have a depressive aunt but we only see her when she’s manically happy.”
    He mixes himself another rum and Coke. “Me, I’m the Lone Ranger in the family.”
    She laughs while giving him a quizzical look. Ranger contains anger, he thinks, pleased with himself.
    Ritchie’s back and it’s Quinn’s turn. He flips over a jack for jackass, which means whenever someone loses a round and has to take a drink, he has to drink too.
    â€œShit,” says Quinn and people laugh. He says it three more times, having fun playing the new guy who doesn’t understand the rules.
    Ritchie’s volume has gone up, Jehoy-something is flirting with Mandy and Todd’s meanness is more direct.
    â€œIt’s people like you,” says Todd, stabbing a finger at Quinn’s shoulder, “always on time, always prepared, wearing your fucking little vest, that make the rest of us look bad. Why do you want to make the rest of us look bad?”
    Nothing sticks to Quinn now because he is the Lone Ranger, dodging bullets or coolly shooting back. “From now on, I’m a new man. Promise. I mean I’ll even dress shitty like you. Little golf shirt. Like where do you shop? Sears fucking Walmart?”
    Vanessa spits with laughter.
    â€œWhoa,” says Mandy.
    Todd stares at him, expressionless, and a soft bull-like snort escapes his beak of a nose.
    Jehoy-something has flipped over a card and is once again making finger horns on his head. Quinn makes horns a second before Todd. He raises hero eyebrows at Vanessa as Todd drinks and adds to the cup.
    When someone stops the game to take a phone call, Quinn confesses to Vanessa he’s recently been dumped. She’s all coos and comfort, knowing, so she says, just how he feels.
    â€œNo way. You,” he says, pointing, “are toooo smart to have ever been dumped.” He’s proud of himself for not saying hot.
    Vanessa looks past Quinn at Todd, who’s checking his cellphone.
    â€œWhat,” says Todd.
    Quinn looks at one and then the other. “Oh my god, you two were an item?”
    â€œItem?” says Todd. “You sound like my grandmother.”
    â€œSuspension bridge and subway system?” Quinn laughs. “I mean, guess it makes sense.”
    â€œWhaddaya you talking about now?” says Todd.
    â€œYeah.” Vanessa leans in