Everything is Nice by Jane Bowles Read Free Book Online

do you live?" she asked him.
    "Calle de las Delicias number six."
    "Does your house belong to you?"
    "My house belongs to my Aunt Gudelia."
    "Is she richer than your mother?"
    "Oh, yes." They said no more to each other.
    There were eight rooms opening onto the patio of Ramôn's house, but only one was furnished. In this room the family cooked and slept. His mother and his aunt were seated opposite one another on two brightly painted chairs. Both were fat and both were wearing black. The only light, came from a charcoal fire which was burning in a brazier on the floor.
    They had bought the chairs that very morning and were consequently feeling lighthearted and festive. When the children arrived they were singing a little song together.
    "Why don't we buy something to drink?" said Gudelia, when they stopped singing.
    "Now you're going to go crazy, I see," said Ramôn's mother. "You're very disagreeable when you're drinking."
    "No, I'm not," said Gudelia.
    "Mother," said Ramôn. "This little girl has come to buy Victoria."
    "I have never seen you before," said Ramôn's mother to Lilina.
    "Nor I," said Gudelia. "I am Ramôn's aunt, Gudelia. This is my house."
    "My name is Lilina Ramirez. I want to bargain for Ramôn's Victoria."
    "Victoria," they repeated gravely.
    "Ramôn is very fond of Victoria and so are Gudelia and I," said his mother. "It's a shame that we sold Alfredo the parrot. We sold him for far too little. He sang and danced. We have taken care of Victoria for a long time, and it has been very expensive. She eats much meat." This was an obvious lie. They all looked at Lilina.
    "Where do you live, dear?" Gudelia asked Lilina.
    "I live in the capital, but I'm staying now at Señora Espinoza's pension."
    "I meet her in the market every day of my life," said Gudelia. "Maria de la Luz Espinoza. She buys a lot. How many people has she staying in her house? Five, six?"
    "Nine."
    "Nine! Dear God! Does she have many animals?"
    "Certainly," said Lilina.
    "Come," said Ramôn to Lilina. "Let's go outside and bargain."
    "He loves that snake," said Ramôn's mother, looking fixedly at Lilina.
    The aunt sighed. "Victoria . . . Victoria."
    Lilina and Ramôn climbed through a hole in the wall and sat down together in the midst of some foliage.
    "Listen," said Ramôn. "If you kiss me, I'll give you Victoria for nothing. You have blue eyes. I saw them when we were in the street."
    "I can hear what you are saying," his mother called out from the kitchen.
    "Shame, shame," said Gudelia. "Giving Victoria away for nothing. Your mother will be without food. I can buy my own food, but what will your mother do?"
    Lilina jumped to her feet impatiently. She saw that they were getting nowhere, and unlike most of her countrymen, she was always eager to get things done quickly.
    She stamped back into the kitchen, opened her eyes very wide in order to frighten the two ladies, and shouted as loud as she could: "Sell me that snake right now or I will go away and never put my foot in this house again."
    The two women were not used to such a display of rage over the mere settlement of a price. They rose from their chairs and started moving about the room to no purpose, picking up things and putting them down again. They were not quite sure what to do. Gudelia was terribly upset. She stepped here and there with her hand below her breast, peering about cautiously. Finally she slipped out into the patio and disappeared.
    Ramôn took Victoria out of his pocket. They arranged a price and Lilina left, carrying her in a little box.
    Meanwhile Señora Ramirez and her daughter were on their way home from the band concert. Both of them were in a bad humor. Consuelo was not disposed to talk at all. She looked angrily at the houses they were passing and sighed at everything her mother had to say. "You have no merriment in your heart," said Señora Ramirez. "Just revenge." As Consuelo refused to answer, she continued. "Sometimes I feel that I am walking along with an