Fatal Hearts by Norah Wilson Read Free Book Online

you before, Boyd, I don’t date. I’ve seen too many med school students and residents wind up dating someone in the city where they’re training. Next thing you know, they’re getting married, buying a house, adopting a dog from the local rescue, and settling in. I’ve seen it again and again, and I promised myself that would never be me. I just won’t do that—won’t constrain my career choices that way. Josh and I were friends, but that was it.”
    “Interesting.” He studied her with those tawny eyes.
    She felt a flush creeping up her neck, but she held his gaze. “Very un interesting, actually,” she said. “But it’s the way it has to be. I have plans.”
    “Of course you have plans. Medicine isn’t the kind of career you fall into. But no dating? No romance? No sex? Isn’t that a rather radical choice for someone so young?”
    “I’m not nearly as young as I could have been.”
    “Excuse me?”
    “For this point in my career, I’m almost two years behind the cohort I started out with. Two years that I threw away on a relationship. I let myself get dragged off course. When I dusted myself off and got back into a medical program, which I was damned lucky to be able to do, I swore it wouldn’t happen again. I’m not going to throw away my tomorrow for a relationship today. A relationship that would only tie me down to someone else’s expectations.”
    “Did Josh know that? I mean, about you dropping out of med school?”
    “Of course.” She frowned. “He was a great guy, my friend , not some jerk in a bar. I owed him more than just the standard I-don’t-date line. You think I’d have rebuffed his overtures without explaining?”
    “Of course you wouldn’t. Sorry.”
    She sagged in her chair. “No, I’m sorry. It was a simple question. I shouldn’t have jumped down your throat.” She pushed the weight of her hair back. “I told him the whole sad story. We actually talked about it a few times, how not all men were controlling jerks and that when the time was right, the perfect guy would turn up, et cetera. Of course, I told him the same would happen for him. He’d solve the riddle of your birth parents, go back to the big city, meet an amazing woman who wouldn’t be nearly good enough for him, but he’d fall in love with her anyway, and that would be that.”
    She glanced up to see that his face was contorted with pain.
    “Oh, Boyd, I’m sorry. You don’t need reminding of all the things he’ll miss out on.”
    “But it’s true, isn’t it? He never got to hold the woman of his dreams, make love to her. Never got to marry, have children, grandchildren.”
    Her chest constricted with grief. Poor Josh! If ever a guy deserved those things, it was him. For all the pushback he’d given their happily married friends about not wanting to join their ranks just yet, he’d have made a wonderful husband and a loving father. Maybe she should have been pushing him too, urging him to find that woman. Instead, the two of them had banded together to fight off their matchmaking friends.
    God, she missed him. How much worse Boyd must feel, losing his only brother. His twin. The thought had her on the verge of tears, and she had to blink rapidly to clear them.
    She heard him stifle a curse.
    “I’m sorry.” His voice was low, gruff, vibrating with his own grief. “I’ve upset you.”
    She gave him a gentle smile. The softness—the sadness—in those golden eyes had her reaching across the small table to place a comforting hand on his forearm. She felt his muscles tense under her fingers and withdrew her hand.
    “It’s not your fault. And I started that line of discussion, if you’ll remember.” She hugged her arms around herself. “Besides, I agreed to come here. I agreed to talk about Josh. It’s just still so . . . fresh, you know?”
    “I know.”
    The waiter approached the table with their beers. “Are we ready to order, or do you need a few more minutes?” he