Final Score: Part One (Game On #5) by Kyra Lennon Read Free Book Online

head. “That’s not what I said and it’s not what I meant. I have everything I’ve ever wanted, Radleigh. I have you and we have Jessica. But at times, it’s like I’ve lost myself a little. I love being a mum and I can’t wait to be your wife. I’m just considering that there are other options. I don’t have to just be Jessica’s mum or your wife. I could work again.”
    “And what would we do with Jessica while we’re both at work? While we’re both on the road?”
    “We could hire someone to watch her or…” I stopped abruptly, not wanting to confess I’d spoken to his mother about this first.
    “Or what?”
    I got to my feet and Radleigh sat up straight, waiting for my answer.
    “Your mum said-”
    “You talked to my mom about this?” He stood up too, pacing the room. “For God’s sakes, Leah! You didn’t come to me to discuss this. You’ve obviously already made the decision!”
    “I haven’t,” I said, reaching out to stop him pacing, but he shrugged my hand off. “Radleigh, come on. Why is this such a big issue for you anyway? This is just an idea right now.”
    “It’s more than an idea if you’ve figured out all the answers before talking to me about it.”
    “You’re not being fair. If I’d tried to talk to you without considering the problems that would have been wrong too.”
    He stopped, glaring at me for reading him so well. He wasn’t mad at me for thinking ahead, he was mad at me for springing this on him out of nowhere.
    “Radleigh, please listen to me. I know this is sudden. I know I haven’t mentioned wanting to go back to work before, and the truth is, I hadn’t really considered it. I said I wanted to be here for Jessica and that’s what I wanted to do. I’m not saying that has to change, I’m just asking how you feel about it.”
    For a moment my words hung in the air and I held my breath, waiting to see if he would calm down and listen or continue to yell. With a sigh, he sank back onto the sofa. “I don’t like it.”
    His words were spoken, not shouted, but even though he’d said he didn’t like it, his tone told me he was willing to discuss it, and my muscles slowly unclenched.
    “Tell me why?” I asked, softly.
    “You know why. For all the reasons we talked about before.”
    All the reasons I was hesitant. Because we wanted Jessica to have a life that didn’t involve both of her parents working all the time in jobs that took them away from home. Because we didn’t want strangers taking care of her. Because me being at home was what we’d both agreed.
    I took a step towards him. “I know. But you have to understand, no matter how much I love Jessica, I still need something for me. Something that means I have things to talk about other than Jessica. Our friends adore her but they don’t want to hear baby talk all the time, and I don’t want to only talk about that. I miss having things to say that don’t revolve around the inside of this house.”
    “We’re supposed to do what’s best for Jessica, not what’s best for you.”
    His words hit me like a fist to the face. “Did you just accuse me of being selfish?”
    Was I being selfish? Maybe. But whether I’d realised it or not, the things I’d said were all true. I loved my life but I did miss adult conversation; conversation that centred around more than Jessica’s daily routine.
    Radleigh stared at me. After a moment he shook his head. “I’m sorry. That wasn’t fair. Selfish is the last thing you are.” He held his hand out to me and pulled me on to his lap, wrapping his arms around me. “I’m just surprised, that’s all.”
    “Me too. I didn’t see this coming either.” I kissed him lightly on the lips. “If you really, really hate the idea of me going back to work, I won’t. But I’d like us to think about it.”
    “We can.” Radleigh pulled me in closer. “But with the wedding coming up and… earlier you said we could talk about having another baby-”
    “Is that