Finding Chase (Chasing Nikki) by Lacey Weatherford Read Free Book Online

laughing and posing together. They were pictures I’d never seen before.
    I gravitated toward them, wanting to study them closer. Involuntarily my hand reached to stroke Nikki’s face.
    “These are beautiful,” I said softly.
    “I thought you might like them. She was so happy.”
    “You all look wonderful. I’ve never seen these.”
    “My mom came and took them. She did this as a graduation surprise. I’d forgotten about her taking them. Nikki never saw them either.”
    “What game were these taken at?”
    Her face fell slightly. “At the homecoming game.”
    My heart clenched tightly, memories of that night—both good and bad—washing over me. “So these are some of the last pictures taken of her, other than the ones she and I took at the dance together. You need to tell your mom to give these to Justine. She would really like to have them. Nikki’s . . .” I couldn’t bring myself to say the word, “being gone, has been hard on her.”
    “I know. I’ve been to visit her a couple times—not nearly as much as you have, though. It’s nice you stay in touch with them as often as you do”
    I shrugged. “They’re a part of my family. She and my mom are best friends, and Timmy and Clara need me now that Nikki’s gone.”
    “You’re their connection to her,” she said, patting my arm.
    “They’d be better off with her instead. I wish I could give her back to them.” My eyes were still glued to her face.
    “This wasn’t your fault, Chase. You don’t need to try to repay something you don’t owe.”
    The panic welled inside me. “It was my fault, Britt. She was breaking the rules, sneaking out to meet me. If I hadn’t encouraged her to do that, her accident would’ve never happened.”
    She grabbed my chin and turned my face toward hers. I stared into her big blue eyes. “Did you ask her to sleep with you?”
    “I told her I wanted to.” I swallowed thickly.
    “Answer the question, Chase. Did you ask her to sleep with you?”
    I slowly shook my head. “No. She surprised me with it.”
    “Did you set up the place and time to meet?”
    Again I shook my head. “No. She wanted it to be special. She suggested when and where.”
    “This was her choice, not yours. She made the plans. You’re not at fault here—not in any way. Why can’t you see that?” She released my chin and brushed her hand gently along my cheek.
    “Because if she’d never met me, then it wouldn’t have been an issue.”
    “If she’d never met you, it could’ve been some other guy she was with. You can’t play the “what if” game. Things happen every day—sometimes horrible things—we are powerless to change. Stop trying to take the blame for what happened. Stop trying to make up for it, and just be yourself. Live your life and be happy.”
    “I don’t know how.” It was the most honest thing I could say.
    She nodded. “I can understand that. We’re all a little scarred from it.” She paused and observed the pictures again. “I guess we need to concentrate on remembering the good things, and do our best to stick together and work through one day at a time. You’ve grieved for nine months now. I know it’s harder for you, because you loved her in a different capacity than the rest of us, but we really do want to help you.”
    “I know—and I appreciate it.”
    She hugged me briefly before heading toward the door. “Come on. Let’s go get some dinner.”
    I cast one more longing glance at her wall before I followed.
     

Chapter Seven
    Brett and Tana wanted to go to The Devil’s Pit. It was a swanky sports grill and bar on Mill Avenue rumored to be a favorite place among the ASU Sun Devil crowd. It didn’t appear to be too busy when we pulled up, since school hadn’t started yet, but right away I noticed a potential problem.
    “Hey, isn’t that Matt’s car?” I asked Brett discretely when we got out, and he glanced in the direction I nodded.
    “Sure looks like it.” His brows furrowed as