Frankie Styne & the Silver Man by Kathy Page Read Free Book Online Page A

won’t have to worry about what school, or teaching him things myself. Or about his career and stuff like that.’ She looked up at them. ‘This is better,’ she said, and smiled. ‘I’m not like the rest of them in that ward.’
    â€˜Just—’ began Mrs Purvis, but the doctor had interrupted:
    â€˜Of course, there’s always some hope . . .’
    â€˜We can certainly do without that,’ Liz told Jim, though at the time she’d been hiding well; she had half smiled, looked the doctor straight in the eye until he looked back down at his notes . . . She set Jim to air on the mat at her feet, wiped herself, examined the tissue, and wondered idly if Jim’s shit would change to the adult colour all of a sudden or gradually.
    â€˜Just the necessary things is a lot, Liz,’ Mrs Purvis had said when the interruption was over. Her eyes slid away from Liz’s relentless gaze, then returned, slid away, returned.
    â€˜There will be problems later. When you’re thirty-five—I know that’s difficult to imagine, Liz—Jim will have grown up, but he won’t have left home. There are facilities, but they’re always under threat. And it’s harder to let go later on. You might get terribly lonely and frustrated.’
    â€˜I don’t,’ said Liz proudly, ‘get lonely.’
    The doctor cleared his throat. ‘You’re saying you want to keep Jim?’ he’d asked.
    Want wasn’t quite the right word, but agreeing saved time and so Liz nodded forcefully.
    â€˜Liz, you’re barely nineteen,’ Mrs Purvis said. The word barely had made Liz want to laugh, but she kept her face still. ‘You’re on your own. Perhaps care is an option you should consider seriously, Liz.’
    â€˜No. I’ll try it on my own,’ Liz had replied, because the thought of filling in another official document made her insides melt. Years ago she and Grammy had watched a programme in which a man was spread-eagled on the ground, his arms and legs tied to pegs which were driven into the ground. Each of the forms she had completed and signed since she’d made the mistake of telling Purvis her name had made her feel just like that. She was losing her freedom—not that she’d used it for much, but that was her business. Now she lay exposed in bright midday light. Anyone could find her, if they wanted to. A broad column of ants would march in a straight line across the sand and begin to devour her bite by bite.
    â€˜You’re sure?’ Mrs Purvis had asked, fingering the slender chain that went around her neck and then down inside her blouse. Above the enormous grey eyes her brows were pulled together and her forehead divided into wavery squares. ‘Liz, it’s easier now. When you’ve had him for a few years, they’ll think you can cope and they won’t put themselves out. And, Liz—you could still go and visit him, every day, if you wanted.’
    â€˜No,’ said Liz, tossing back her hair, then remembering: ‘thanks.’
    â€˜If she wants to keep it, you should let her,’ the doctor said. Liz could tell that he cared about her less than Purvis, but somehow she’d liked him more.
    After, Purvis had walked back with her to the B & B. For a long time—and for once, Liz had thought—Purvis didn’t seem to be able to think of anything to say. Then, when they were almost there, she cleared her throat and asked, ‘Liz, I know there were problems at first, but do you love Jim now?’
    Liz wiped her sleeve across her face. She thought that if she answered right they would leave her alone, and that was worth almost anything, even the loss of a limb or faculty—even having had a baby. She met Purvis’s eyes and said, ‘Yes.’
    Purvis took her arm and she’d let her, though she felt like seizing it back. ‘I’ll do what I can,