Gathering Clouds by V. C. Andrews Read Free Book Online

laughed.
    “Maybe they’re too simple.”
    “We spend too much time disguising our feelings as it is,” I said and he looked at me sharply.
    “Yes,” he said.
    Neither of us spoke. He stepped closer. I could feel his desire, but also his hesitation so I reached out and took his hand, bringing it to my breast.
    “Feel my heartbeat,” I said. “It’s got a mind of its own.
    He smiled, kept his hand on my breast, and then slowly brought his lips to mine.
    “Don’t tell me I’m the first white girl you’ve kissed like that,” I warned him.
    He laughed.
    “I wasn’t going to tell you that. I was going to tell you that you were the first girl period I kissed like that.”
    “If that’s true, you’re a natural.”
    “I don’t need practice?”
    “You need lots of practice,” I said and we kissed again. “You’re getting better,” I whispered.
    He looked at me, searching my face for some sign that said yes.
    If he didn’t see it, he heard it. Every part of me was crying out. He glanced at the pullout and saw my willingness.
    Our lovemaking was gentle, each move either of us made tentative, waiting for confirmation or acceptance, expecting the other to do something to stop it, to draw back. Neither of us was willing to surrender or retreat. I wanted to be naked and to have him naked beside me as quickly as possible. I don’t even remember how our clothes peeled off our bodies, but we were soon embracing on his pullout, clinging to each other, every part of ourselves longing to be touched, caressed, kissed. I opened to him as if I had been waiting for him from the moment my sex had risen from whatever place inside me it had been kept waiting. It was though nothing before, no kiss, no lovemaking, no whispers of love had ever happened. I was a virgin again.
    And most of all, I was boarding a rocket ship after all. My heart was thumping so hard, I remembered Petra Loman’s warnings of a potential heart attack, but I welcomed it as if I knew that in death’s embrace I would always be with Larry. Nothing but these moments mattered, not my heritage, my name, my future, anything. It was truly as though I had discovered that fairy tales and fantasies could be real.
    Afterward, we both fell into a sweet silence. Neither of us spoke about what we had done. It was as if we both believed we had dreamed the entire thing, that we had both fallen into a coma while we were there and had just regained consciousness. He walked me to my car and reviewed the directions back to my dorm for me. Then he leaned in and kissed me good night. We made no plans to meet again. We didn’t have to. We knew it was inevitable.
    Lynette was back before I was and asleep. She heard me come in and stirred, but she didn’t wake up and start pummeling me with questions as the roommates of other girls in other rooms would surely do. I slept so deeply and so long into the morning, she was already gone when I awakened. I had breakfast in the dorm cafeteria and talked to some of the other girls, but I didn’t tell any of them about Larry or where I had been. It was easy not to do that with these girls. They were too consumed with telling me about what they had done. I smiled to myself thinking how ironic it was that I could keep my secret easier among these girls. They were too conceited to be interested in anyone else.
    “You had a phone call,” Lynette told me when I returned to our room. She had been to the school library and had started work on a term paper.
    She handed me a slip of paper that simply read, Larry, will call again.
    She sat at her desk and worked, keeping her back to me.
    “Okay,” I said. “Don’t pretend you’re not full of curiosity.”
    She turned and smiled.
    “About what?”
    “Very funny. You know, about my date.”
    “Date? Meeting someone at a jazz club and listening to poetry and music?”
    “I didn’t come right back,” I said.
    She stared, looked at her book, and then turned back to me.
    :If you leave