Getting It by Alex Sanchez Read Free Book Online Page B

this?”
    â€œSure.” Carlos smiled. “That’s called an accent wall, to match the faux headboard.”
    His three friends stared at him as if he were an alien.
    As the boys hung out, the discussion turned to Playboy and the Internet profile he’d set up—which so far hadn’t turned out so good. He’d placed it on Hot-or-Snot.com, a teen hookup site where your photo could be rated on a scale of one to ten by anyone who saw it. Anything over five meant you were hot. But under five, you may as well crawl beneath a rock and die.
    Since Playboy had posted his photo/profile, his rating had slippedsteadily from its opening to 8.5, and the only e-mail response he’d received was from a hugely overweight woman in her late thirties who lived fifty miles away—but she was willing to travel.
    â€œDude, look at her!” Playboy showed Carlos her J-peg. “She looks ready to give birth to a Sumo wrestler.”
    Pulga countered. “Maybe she is a Sumo wrestler.”
    â€œLet me see your profile,” Carlos said to Playboy.
    All the boys leaned over the computer as Playboy clicked to his profile. Below his face pic it read:
    USER NAME:
HornyBoy0001.
    DESCRIPTION:
Male, 16 …
    Toro remarked, “You’re not sixteen yet.”
    â€œI will be in a year.” Playboy grinned as Carlos kept reading in a low voice: “… six feet tall…”
    Playboy wasn’t actually that tall, either. He was about an inch shorter than Carlos.
    â€œâ€¦ sexy, VGL …” Carlos asked, “What’s VGL mean?”
    Toro replied, “Volunteers to get laid?”
    â€œThat too.” Playboy grinned. “It means ‘Very Good-Looking.’”
    â€œBetter take your photo down,” Pulga remarked. “Or they’ll see you’re lying.”
    Playboy punched his arm. Carlos continued reading: “… hot bod … great personality … into music (hip hop, house, Los Lonely Boys) …”
    â€œYou should put that you’re a good dancer,” Carlos told him.
    â€œYou think so?” Playboy said, then decided, “Nah, that’s too gay.”
    Beneath the description, Carlos read the heading LIKES: “Chicks who’ve got a sexy bod … I mean seriously hot! … who can get wild and are willing to go out of their way for me.”
    â€œSumo mama is willing to go out of her way,” Pulga commented.
    â€œShut up,” Playboy ordered. “She obviously didn’t read my ‘dislikes.’”
    Under the heading DISLIKES, Carlos read: “Fatties and/or freakishly tall chicks (no offense, Pulga) …”
    â€œYou jerk!” Pulga socked Playboy’s shoulder.
    Carlos continued reading: “… uglies (don’t pretend you’re not) … stinky chicks … stuck-up bitches … Internet sluts … prudes … girls who won’t shut up … and needy twits.”
    Carlos finished reading the profile and said, “Hmm.”
    â€œWhat do you mean, ‘hmm’?” Playboy asked. “What’s wrong with it? Why aren’t the hot babes answering?”
    â€œMaybe you should change your picture,” Toro suggested.
    Playboy frowned, leaning closer to examine his photo. “I look needy, don’t I?”
    â€œYou look like you need to take a dump,” Pulga told him.
    â€œYeah,
on you!”
Playboy swung out to punch him again, but Pulga ducked.
    â€œMaybe you should use a pic showing your abs,” Toro suggested. “That’s what a lot of guys do.”
    He quickly clicked through other boy profiles. About half the guys either had their shirts off or at least pulled up to show their abs.
    â€œYou think I should?” Playboy asked Carlos.
    â€œSure, why not?” Carlos shrugged. “We can use my camera.” The digital had been a Christmas present from his ma.
    â€œHere, stand like in this guy’s