trees, but it didn’t give any extra heat the afternoon I set out to cut wood. I rolled one of the logs upright. Thank goodness Hobbs had sense enough to have a tree chopped down and sectioned. The maul was heavier than I thought. I swung it over my shoulder, losing my footing but regaining my balance. In that moment, a anger for Hobbs boiled inside of me, giving me a start. The feeling was so strong I swung that maul hard and bounced it off the wood without making a dent. Hobbs should have been right there with me. The maul was lighter the next time I swung it over my shoulder. The weight was a burden, a promise. The third blow brought a split in the wood. The anger had turned to pure strength as it moved through me.
Would Hobbs ever come back? Husbands didn’t just walk away from their wives. But I knew that was a childish thought. A man could do anything he felt like to a woman. Nobody would stop him from telling his wife what to do. Hobbs was my husband. Our marriage was built on his wants and dislikes. He made the money and owned the land. He owned me. If he said I was stupid, then I was. But the more I stayed alone the more I knew that just wasn’t so. It was him who was stupid and mean.
The maul hit its mark and half the log fell away. Warmth spread through me like a spring day. I went at my task for a couple of hours and ended up with a decent pile of wood. My arms were numb and my back ached, but a new strength burned in my muscles. For the first time in my life, I thought I could do anything.
The bathwater turned to a boil just as I heard a truck. I ran to see: it was only Jack. How crazy was I when one minute Ihated Hobbs, and the next I was hanging in the window, pining away for love, praying he’d come home?
Jack jumped from the cab and looked directly at the new pile of wood and scratched his chin.
I met him at the door. “What brings you this way?” My thoughts were still cemented on Hobbs, so I almost missed the soft look Jack gave me. I couldn’t have him feeling sorry for me.
“I wanted to check in on you.” He nodded at the wood. “It seems you’ve done fine alone.”
“I can do anything myself,” I bragged. “Come on in.” I opened the kitchen door.
He took off his hat. “I could have chopped the wood. I will next time. No sense in not taking my help.”
“It’s not your place, Jack. If I’m going to live up here alone …” These words came to life outside my mind and stopped me in the middle of the sentence.
Jack’s face turned pink with the heat of the stove. “I’ll help. You’re family.” He warmed his hands. “You and Shelly have done a fine job with the place.”
“She’s a good worker.”
He looked at the bathtub between us on the kitchen floor. “I won’t stay.”
The thought of another lonely supper made me sick. “Why don’t you stay and eat?” I could see he was about to say no, so I rushed on. “You could stack the wood I chopped while I take a bath.”
He relaxed. “It’ll be a pleasure to stack the wood. You split wood with your mama?”
“Nah, this is my first time, but Mama and me worked hard.” A sharp pain worked behind my ribs.
“You’re something else, Nellie.” He laughed and went outside. I was smiling for the first time in weeks.
My prettiest dress hung over one of the kitchen chairs. Isoaked in the copper tub while the water worked hard at turning ice-cold. Mama would say I was messing with fire having this handsome man for supper, but I wasn’t with Mama. There was no harm in having a meal with my brother-in-law and nothing wrong with being pretty. Jack was a gentleman. And for all I knew he had him a girl down in Asheville somewhere. I closed my eyes and imagined him answering all the questions I needed answered.
Eleven
I cooked the pork chops good and crunchy. The black-eyed peas bubbled on the stove, and the whole kitchen smelled of sweet cornbread. Jack ate so much I thought he’d pop open. Him sitting at the table