Give Yourself Away by Barbara Elsborg Read Free Book Online

had that much sense.
    “Not then. This was yesterday. Four o’clock.”
    “I didn’t see her yesterday. This is ridiculous.” Oh fuck.
    “Where were you yesterday at four?”
    “In here.”
    “Was anyone with you?”
    “No.” The little bitch had probably checked.
    “I have to investigate,” Geraldine said. “I can’t just let it go. She’s made a formal complaint.”
    “No one has ever made a complaint about me.”
    “Not until now.”
    “I…I…” I’m gay. The words refused to come out, just like he’d refused to come out.
    Geraldine stood. “I have to suspend you, you know that. Every effort will be made to preserve your anonymity.”
    Tell her, for fuck’s sake.
    “Geraldine…” He pushed to his feet. Just say it. Tell her. This will all go away. “I’m… I didn’t do it.”
    She nodded. “I believe you, but I have to be seen doing the right thing. Wait for my call. Be careful what you say to anyone, even friends. Publicity is not a good thing, no matter how innocent you feel you are. You might want to talk to your union. I’ll arrange cover. Don’t worry about your classes.”
    Don’t worry about my fucking classes? Shit. This is my life, you stupid…
    Even after she’d walked out, March could still hardly believe what happened. The urge to look for Jemima Golding and demand she tell the truth subsided under the awareness of what a mistake that would be. Add harassment to his supposed crimes and he’d be out for good.
    He slumped behind his desk. All he had to do was admit he was gay. Admit? Fuck it. It wasn’t a crime.
    Confess.
    Own up.
    Reveal. That was a better word because concealment was what he’d gone for, ever since the day he’d realized he liked boys better than girls, ever since he’d fallen for one particular boy. He’d tried not to, but he’d been unable to help himself and it had led to disaster.
    Since then, he’d only dated women because he couldn’t get over the love he’d lost. No one could replace him. So March didn’t try. He’d even gotten engaged and almost given himself an ulcer over that, though he wasn’t the one who’d suffered the most. He’d hurt Annabel and he’d always regret that.
    March gathered together a few of his things and stormed out.
    His temper hadn’t improved by the time he reached his cottage. He looked into the sky, then up the hill at the far end of town, and gritted his teeth. Why not? He’d leave his car at the supermarket and walk from there.
    As March slogged his way up the hill, he knew there had to be an easier way to tempt fate. What had seemed like a good plan morphed into a not-very-sensible one the longer and higher he climbed. The foil kite in his backpack wasn’t intended for the use he’d planned so he’d leave it in there, take a moment to admire the view, decide what the hell he was going to do about that allegation and head back down.
    But as he knew he would, March reversed that decision when he finally reached the hilltop and saw the valley falling away far below, and beyond that, whitecaps glistening on a sun-drenched sea.
    There was no one around to witness his idiocy or to tell him not to do it. Not that March would have listened, because one thing he generally didn’t do was take someone’s advice. Plus, why waste hours walking down when in minutes he could be back where he’d started? More or less. Assuming the wind carried him in the right direction. Assuming he didn’t impale himself on a tree, electrocute himself or crack his head on a wall. And wasn’t there more to this than ending up back where he’d started?
    He opened his backpack, tugged out the red-and-white valved foil kite, and spread it across the hillside, making sure it wasn’t twisted, ripped or disconnected from any line because there was a difference between taking a risk and being a reckless idiot. He clipped on his helmet, though the idea of that saving him if he fell out of the sky was laughable.
    Once he was in the