Giving It Up: Pushing the Boundaries, Book 1 by Audra North Read Free Book Online

life and you will never want for anything. It is, ‘Bend over.’ It is, ‘Take off your shirt.’ You do not even need to add a qualifier like ‘now’ or ‘immediately’ and certainly not ‘please.’ You have to own the role. You have to live the role. And you will be obeyed.”
    Oh God, this is a lot to take in. To be so bold… could she do it? Owning something like this…living this life…that sounded intimidating.
    It was one thing to live life through the lens of a camera. It was another thing to jump naked into a mud pit and wrestle it into submission.
    “But if you have any concerns about your own situation, then part of being confident is being able to say no, and to do it effectively,” Michelle added. “Before it begins at all, even.”
    Beatrice shook her head. “No. I’m not worried about being in danger.” She paused, wondering if she should say anything more. But thoughts of Warren’s face, scowling in disapproval, spurred her to speak. “I’m worried about failing,” she admitted.
    “You might.” Michelle nodded, not bothering to pretend. “Sometimes our clients refuse to pay if they are not satisfied. But that is something you must accept will happen from time to time.” She shrugged as if it meant nothing. “Like I said, becoming a great Domme is hard work, and you must accept both your shortcomings and your strengths. Own both of them. Own your life .” She moved her finger in the air in a circular motion. “It’s a constant learning process.”
    That sounded like it would take a long time. But this was her only chance. She had five weeks with a man she never would have had the courage to approach otherwise. She shook her head. “It’s not the money that—I mean, I do need the money. I guess that’s why I’m doing this. Or, at least, why he thinks I’m doing this.” She didn’t miss how she had again emphasized he —Warren—and Michelle certainly didn’t, either.
    Michelle studied her for a moment, as if debating what to say next. Would she warn Beatrice off of this? God. What if she did? Beatrice wasn’t sure she could give up the chance with him. The way he had looked at her when they’d met at the batting cages—so much heat. So much promise…
    Please don’t make me give this up.
    Michelle must have somehow divined those thoughts, because instead of cautioning Beatrice again, she rose and walked over to a stack of books on a nearby stool. Her long fingers stroked down the spines, then stopped halfway down to pull a thin volume out.
    She handed it to Beatrice. “You might find this book useful.”
    Beatrice looked down at the cover, an unadorned, glossy black with gold lettering, like the door to Queen Dommes’s office. Dominacracy, by M.M.
    “Oh,” she breathed, battling between gratitude and embarrassment. “Uh, thank you.”
    “Do you have any other questions?”
    About a billion of them.
    But she wouldn’t even know where to begin. “No,” she said, but Michelle’s command echoed in her mind. Never lie . “I mean, I’m a little overwhelmed right now.”
    Michelle looked at her with an assessing eye. “What is it that you want, Beatrice?”
    For a second, Beatrice faltered. Did Michelle mean, What do you want out of this arrangement with Warren? Or did she mean in general? Or did she mean —
    “I want more.” The words sort of fell out by surprise in the middle of Beatrice’s train of thought, and she immediately clapped her hand over her mouth as though she’d yelled something terrible and dirty in the middle of Easter service, or something.
    Michelle raised one perfectly sculpted golden brow. “From what? Or whom?”
    What do I have to get anything from? I finally have independence, but not much money. I like my job, but I don’t love it. I want a gallery, a museum—heck, a subway station—to exhibit my work, but I don’t have a good enough portfolio. I want Warren. But…
    A few seconds ticked by before Beatrice could answer.
    “From