Good Heavens by Margaret A. Graham Read Free Book Online Page A

recovered when the bell rang and Group ended.
    The women were quick to exit the room, dashing outside where they could smoke. I wanted to go in my room and close the door, but I knew Ursula wanted to hear how it went in town, so I followed her into the office. Obviously upset, she shut the door behind us.
    â€œEsmeralda, your interruptions in Group are not helpful. They disrupt the program. Do you know how long it has taken me to get even this far with these ladies? They have such low self-esteem, they won’t open up when we are one on one, but as you saw today, in Group they are less intimidated.”
    I didn’t say it, but I thought to myself, Why wouldn’t they have “low self-esteem”? If you steal a prescription pad and write prescriptions for all your friends, how can you feel good about yourself? As I saw it, this Linda felt proud of what she’d done, but I wasn’t going to bring that up and challenge Ursula. Something was building up inside of her, and it wouldn’t take much to make her explode.
    â€œI instituted Group,” she was saying, “to create an informal atmosphere among peers, which is a device that works well. Until they verbalize their feelings, I cannot diagnose and remedy their problems. You have certainly truncated the process, Esmeralda, and such interference will not be tolerated.”
    Where I come from, younger people respect older people like me. Imagine her dressing me down like that. I had to bite my tongue. Of course, I’m not the kind that stays speechless for long. “Ursula, if these girls—”
    â€œLadies,” she snapped. Her stringy body was twitching with nerves, and she was going to town on another paper clip.
    Ladies? I thought. Ladies don’t wear tattoos and do such things as I’m hearing here . But I didn’t say what I was thinking.
    I could stay quiet in ten languages if only I knowed ten. I did put in my two cents’ worth, though. “Well, if these ladies have low self-esteem, in most cases it’s their own fault. If I had done the things Linda done, I’d be ashamed to show my face.”
    â€œThat’s hardly the point. I would appreciate it if you would leave analysis to me. I have my master’s in psychology and am well qualified to assess and rectify whatever we have here.”
    â€œI’m sure you can, Ursula, and I don’t mean to get in your way. It’s just that I don’t think there’s much good comes out of wallowing around in the muck and mire of a miserable past when we could be looking to the future—you know, looking to what Jesus can do for us.”
    â€œThat is a simplistic view. My heart’s desire is to see these ladies come to know the Lord, but it is absolutely necessary to assiduously address the insidious circumstances that have entrapped them. Once we resolve the problems that led them into addictions, then we can lead them to Christ. My practice is based on biblical principles, Esmeralda. I know what I’m doing!”
    She had reached the boiling point, so I didn’t say anything, just waited for her to cool down. We sat in silence. Finally she said, “Well, what’s your report?”
    I told her all the creditors were willing to give us ten days more, and I asked her if any money had come in. “Not a thing.” She started scanning the receipt ledger.“We can depend on getting fifty dollars from a church in Rock Hill, but they are irregular in sending it. . . . Dr. Elsie sends us a hundred dollars a month, but it must have slipped her mind now that she’s in Vermont taking care of her terminally ill sister. . . . There is a Mrs. Hirsch whose daughter was helped at Priscilla Home. The daughter lived a Christian life for a year or two after leaving here, but then she was killed in an automobile accident. Her mother used to send us ten dollars a month from her social security check, but she hasn’t sent us