Grasping For Freedom by Debra Kayn Read Free Book Online

though he couldn't understand giving up his freedom and settling down with one woman, despite how highly he respected Tori.
    He sat down on the couch in the large living room overlooking the Lewis River. "Rain said you wanted to see me."
    "Of course, I do. You haven't been by, and I haven't had time to try to find you." Tori pulled her legs up underneath her in the chair across from him. "How're you doing?"
    "Working most days. Bike's running. Bills are paid, so I can say life's pretty damn good," Torque said.
    "You know that's not what I'm talking about," Tori said, and it was the concern he heard in her voice that had him looking away.
    "I'm good." He shrugged. "The muscles are a little tight in the morning, but after a couple of hours working at the garage, my shoulder loosens up."
    He was lucky to be alive. That's what everyone kept telling him. He still wasn't sure the scars were worth worrying about. His recovery had taken time, but he could still ride a bike and that's all that mattered to him.
    "No more flashbacks?" Tori asked, not pulling any punches.
    He stood and walked to the sliding door. Only one woman came around when he was recovering, and Tori made sure he was comfortable and well cared for. Taylor, who was admitted to the hospital at the same time, never mentioned the shooting after making sure he was okay upon her release. Not because she didn't care, she cared too much. He tried to keep his distance, because he'd seen the haunted look in her eyes whenever they were around each other. He respected both women probably more than he respected any man.
    He accepted and understood Taylor's choice to move on and not discuss what'd happened. Things could've turned out differently for everyone, and he accepted what happened. Better him than Rain or Slade, who both had families to look after.
    Tori and Rain spent many nights with him after he got home from the hospital, supporting and taking care of him. He couldn't hide his panic and unease when the doctors had him drugged up and riding high. He'd used the closest thing he had available to cover up the truth and blamed his behavior on the shootings.
    He was good at making excuses. They had no idea his conduct ran back to his time in prison, or that his anger wasn't over what Los Li did to him. He was born into the wrong family. He had a rap sheet longer than his arm and although he was forty-three years old, he'd only spent the last twenty years a free man.
    Keeping his freedom was important, and his biggest fear.
    "Nope. It's in the past. My days are good, like I was telling you; nothing bothers me except a little stiffness in my shoulder in the morning." He turned around and grinned. "I need to get out of here. There's someone waiting for me. Give Lilly a kiss from her Uncle Torque and make sure Rain brings you around to the club."
    Tori got to her feet and walked him to the door. "One of the girls for the club or someone new?"
    He half turned, and kissed her forehead. "I don't slap jack. Go pester one of the other guys about their sex life, huh?"
    "You're no fun." Tori laughed. "You're just afraid I'll end up putting your life in my column in the newspaper."
    Torque shook his head and walked out the door. He waved over his shoulder as he continued down the steps to his bike. Rain was a lucky bastard, but he had his hands full with his old lady. They'd gone through hell and despite the shit Tori went through as a child, she came out balanced. It was Tori's balancing act and ability to move on with life that continued to escape him with his own life. She'd never understand how he had no control, but then again, he wouldn't give her a chance to take on his problems too.
    The sun slipped behind the hills. He flipped on his headlight and cruised the back road to Pitnam. More sedate than he was earlier, he pushed the speed limit to get to Brandy before he wound down.
    As he pulled into the parking lot of Cactus Cove, his timing perfect, he spotted Brandy halfway to her