Half Life by Heather Atkinson Read Free Book Online Page B

or if this time ever came I would leap into the light, eager to escape this half life.  Now the moment has arrived I find I am reluctant to leave.
    “ Why has it come now? ” she says.
    “ I believe I needed to find love. ”   I sound like some bad fairytale character.  “ Now I have it seems I must give it up. ”
    “ You should go, ” she says softly.
    “ Do you want me to? ”
    “ It doesn ’ t matter what I want. ”
    “ Kate, do you want me to go? ”
    “ No because I ’ m selfish but I don ’ t want you to be trapped here forever either.  You may never get another chance like this, ” she tells me bravely, a single tear rolling down her cheek.
    “ I don ’ t want to leave you. ”
    “ I ’ ll be alright. ”
    I take her face in my hands.  “ I can ’ t leave you. ”
    “ You must if you are to find any peace. ”
    Torn, I look back over my shoulder at the swirling vortex.  It truly is beautiful, tempting me in, calling to me.  I close my eyes and whisper in my head please not yet, just a little longer.
    I feel rather than hear or see the acknowledgement of my request.  When I open my eyes, its gone.
    “ What happened? ” says Kate.
    “ I ’ ve been granted more time here. ”
    “ How much? ”
    “ Just a little.  It will come back. ”
    She clings to me tightly, burying her face in my shoulder.  I hold her close, drinking in the scent of her hair, determined to make the most of every precious moment with her.  It could be seconds or it could be days, I have no idea.
    “ We missed our show, ” I say, after we ’ ve remained this way for several minutes in silence.
    “ It ’ s repeated in the morning. ”
    “ Good. ”
    “ Want to get your own back on Marguerita bloody Swirls? ”
    “ Oh yes. ”
    She sits up and pulls what she has told me is called her laptop towards her.  The little screen flickers into life, which never fails to amaze me.
    “ I ’ m going to find out every last detail about her life, ” says Kate, typing furiously.  “ I ’ m going to lift up every stone, dig out every last bit of dirt I can on her and then tell the world. ”
    “ You don ’ t know what you could be opening up.  Everyone has their secrets. ”
    Her eyes turn steely again.  “ She ’ s going to pay for what she did to you. ”
    I take her hand and kiss it.  “ Alright.  But wont that mean you going away? ” I say, not wanting her to leave me.
    “ No.  It ’ s amazing what you can find with a computer and a few well placed phone calls. ”
    She types furiously, looking up information then jotting it down on a notepad.  After speaking furiously into the phone for several minutes she hangs up, looking rather satisfied.
    “ The wheels are in motion.  Now we just have to wait. ”   She glances at her watch and rubs her eyes.  “ It ’ s late and I ’ m tired.  Will you come to bed with me and stay with me the whole night, please? ”  
    This is something we haven ’ t tried yet.  I see her to bed every night but I don ’ t stay because I ’ m frightened of what the physical intimacy between us will lead to.  Blasphemy.  We cannot consummate our relationship like a normal living couple and it is torture.
    But how could I ever resist those big beautiful eyes.  “ Of course I will. ”
    She looks pleased and we walk up to the master bedroom hand in hand.  As I know my time here is short I ’ m reluctant to let her out of my sight, even for a moment.  I wait anxiously until she emerges from the bathroom, a vision in a short white nightgown, her hair loose and brushed out, skin creamy in the dim light.  We climb into bed and she nestles into me.  We lay together quietly and I run my fingers lightly up and down her back.  We kiss gently and soon our passion is roused, leading to the act that I long for more than anything but fear will damn us both.
    “ Wait, stop, ” I say, sitting up.
    “ What is it? ” she says, sitting up with me.  The sight of her