Heart to Heart by Lurlene McDaniel Read Free Book Online

days, until Mom forced me to see a grief counselor. The woman told me nothing I didn’t already know—the car wreck had been a senseless accident, it was okay to grieve but I couldn’t let it control me, life went on … blah-blah-blah. She even suggested that I take an antidepressant “for a few months.” I didn’t want pills. I didn’t want a counselor. I wanted my friend back.
    I wasn’t exactly shining on the volleyball court either. I still liked the game, but my teammates got on my nerves. None of them could play like Elowyn, anticipating my moves like she could read my mind. Coach called me into her office just before theplayoffs. “Lighten up, Kassey. Don’t be so aggressive. The girls are complaining.”
    “Well, they should work harder.”
Whiners
, I thought.
    “We made the playoffs. I’m proud of our team. It doesn’t help morale when the captain is always shouting and criticizing every mistake. We can win this whole thing if we work together.”
    “Aren’t you the one who used to tell us that mistakes don’t win games?”
    Coach blew air through her lips. “I know you’re hurting, but you can’t take it out on the others.”
    I had a zinger comeback but I bit my tongue because Coach won’t tolerate back talk. “Yes, all right. I’ll watch it.”
    We won the first game and the team wanted to go out for ice cream, but I didn’t feel like celebrating. I looked up in the gym stands for Mom, who comes to all my games. As the bleachers cleared and kids streamed past me calling out “Good game,” I caught sight of her in the top row, her back to the wall. Terri was sitting next to her. My heart stumbled. I hadn’t seen her since the funeral and didn’t expect to see her at this game.
    Mom waved, and I watched her and Terri thread their way down the rows toward me. “Nice game,” Mom said, giving me a hug.
    “Terrific,” Tern said.
    “Thanks.” I couldn’t meet Terri’s eyes.
    She reached out and took my hand. “I—I couldn’t stay away. I know how much Ellie loved volleyball and how hard she played the game.”
    “It’s not the same … without …” I didn’t finish because a lump had swelled my throat shut.
    “We miss her too,” Terri said. “More than I can say. Matt wanted to come tonight, but he couldn’t face it.”
    Mom intervened. “Maybe we can go for coffee.”
    “I shouldn’t intrude …”
    “No,” I said. “That’s a good idea.”
    We went to Java the Hut, a coffee shop not far from the school. I got a syrupy fruit drink and Mom and Terri drank coffee. Elowyn and I never liked the taste of coffee much.
    “I miss the activity too,” Terri said, stirring her coffee. “You know, all you kids hanging around the house. It’s so quiet now.”
    “I miss your cookies,” I said.
    She smiled, the corner of her mouth quivering. “I’ve put together two scrapbooks. Of our vacations and Ellie’s school stuff. I have lots of time.”
    She sounded so sad. Mom reached over and took her hand. “We should go to the movies. Dinner too.”
    Terri nodded. I hung my head. “Kassey, you should come over and talk sometime. I’ll show you the books.”
    “I will,” I said. “I’d like to see them.”
    We grew quiet. Coffee cups clinked in the background. The espresso machine hissed, and someone’s cell went off. Terri stared out the window next to our table as if she were looking into a black hole. I shivered. She said, “I haven’t touched a thing in her room. I just shut the door and left it the way she had. Whenever I look inside, it’s like she’s coming back to clean up the mess.”
    “It was an organized mess,” I said. “She knew exactly where everything was no matter how messy her room.”
    Mom cleared her throat. “We should be going.”
    “Oh, of course. Kassey must be tired.”
    “I’m fine,” I said, without much conviction.
    We stood. “I’m serious about you coming over for a visit,” Terri said. “I’d love to see you.” She