His Bundle of Love / the Color of Courage by Patricia Davids Read Free Book Online Page A

lives.”
    Mick nodded, surprised at how well the man understood him. He’d made a snap judgment about Lloyd Winston, thinking the man was an overworked bureaucrat who didn’t care. He was wrong. It was evident that Lloyd cared a lot.
    Mick’s smile faded. “What will happen if Beth doesn’t make it? If she dies—what will happen?”
    “Usually, the body remains here until the family chooses a mortuary, but in this case, she’ll be taken to the city morgue. If no one claims the body after three or four months they’ll bury her. The city provides plots for unclaimed bodies.”
    “What’ll happen if she lives, but her mother doesn’t?”
    “As I said, she’ll be placed in foster care.”
    “No.” Mick heard the word, but almost didn’t believe he had said it. Was he really considering such a deception?
    “I’m sorry, I don’t understand.” Winston stared at him.
    “Beth isn’t going into foster care. I know her mother wouldn’t want that.” Is this what You want, Lord?
    Was he losing his mind? Saying that Beth was his child was a lie. But Mick couldn’t hand her over to strangers—whether she lived or died. Wasn’t this what Caitlin wanted? For him to take care of her child if she couldn’t? He was adopting Beth with her mother’s blessing. His troubled conscience grew quiet.
    “I’ll sign the paternity papers.”
    Winston left and returned a few minutes later. Mick took the form and stared at the blank line on the bottom. Signing it would give the child of a stranger his name. Legally, Beth would become his responsibility forever. It would be up to him to make a home for her, to see that she got to school on time for the first day of kindergarten, to see that she had the money to go to college. He’d become responsible for medical bills that could leave him in debt until he was an old man. If she died today, he would plan her funeral.
    Was this right? Was it truly what God wanted of him? If he didn’t do this, could he live with himself? Could he walk away and go on with his life knowing he had let Caitlin down? He knew that he couldn’t.
    I’m sorry for this lie, Lord, but I believe in my heart that this is what You are asking of me. Please help me to do the right thing. Bending forward, he scrawled his name on the line.
    “Mick, you can come in now.” Sandra stood in the doorway.
    He leaped to his feet. “Is she okay?”
    “She’s stable. Come and see for yourself.”
    He followed her into the nursery. A clear tube stained with droplets of blood protruded from Beth’s right side and led to a plastic box below her bed. In its chambers, a column of water bubbled freely.
    “It looks weird,” Sandra said, “but it doesn’t hurt her.”
    Beth was alive, that was all that mattered to Mick.
    Thank You, God. Make me worthy of this gift.
    He slipped a tentative finger beneath the baby’s limp hand. She lay pale and quiet, making no move to grip his finger as she’d done before. Sandra pulled a tall stool over beside the bed, and Mick nodded his thanks. Sitting down, he tilted his face to gaze at his baby.
    His baby. His daughter. A warm glow replaced the chill in the center of his chest. She belonged to him, legally, if not by blood. How often had he wondered what it would be like? Wondered if he could love an adopted child the same as his own flesh and blood? Now he knew. He’d come to love Beth the first moment she had frowned at him. He loved the way she wrinkled her brow, and he loved her long, delicate fingers. He loved the way she kicked her feet over the edge of her bunting, and the way she fussed until someone changed her diaper when she was wet. He couldn’t imagine loving any child more.
    As he sat watching her and trying to imagine a future together he saw Beth’s face contort into a grimace. She stiffened her arms, holding them out straight. Her whole body twitched. He looked for help. “Sandra, something’s wrong.”
    She came quickly to the bedside. She took hold of