for? All frickin’ day? Nothing was worth this, not Renny, not acceptance, not being ‘nice’, not the most fantastic sex on the planet. Okay, maybe that last one.
* * * * * * * * * *
The good news? I got pretty good at the diaper thing. The bad news? That baby is nothing but a pooping machine.
Nobody had mentioned relieving me of duty so I had no idea what time it was before Claire actually made an appearance. She seemed so happy with her little squirmy Winston Churchill look alike. There must be something that happens to women when they give birth. They either gain the patience of saints or lose the last of their minds. Hard to tell which with Claire since she acted like I didn’t exist. No thanks for watching her baby or thanks for cleaning up so much shit, nothing. Fine, I thought, if I’m invisible I’ll be just that, and I slipped out the door just as she was allowing her child to attach itself to her body and suck the life out of her.
I closed the door quickly but silently and had a case of the shudders. For the first time in my life I actually thanked God for what I had once thought was a tragedy. Sometimes I think there is a greater intelligence who has my back. I might have thought I wanted children but I was told No, not for you little lady, you do not have the proper disposition for raising children. Why don’t you go to the blazing hot desert and write about death and destruction, you’ll find it easier to do.
And I did.
7.
I twisted and turned until I found myself outside. I did my best to stay away from the house, and any screaming, poopy babies, for the rest of the morning. I didn’t even try to find Renny and I had no idea what he was up to. I was trying to save my sanity. It was everyone for themselves at this point. I didn’t want to be sent back to baby purgatory.
The house and grounds started to fill around noon and there were so many people it was ridiculous. I have been entrenched with smaller platoons. I got the feeling that the family was so large even they couldn’t keep track of each other.
I finally found Renny out in back playing Ping-Pong. He was losing terribly to a small girl. She looked to be around ten years old, with long, long, thick, wild black hair and a fiery expression. He waved at me and in so doing missed another ball. This girl was taking no prisoners.
I found a lawn chair to settle in and watch. The duo was attracting quite a crowd, including Reade who was doing his best to thwart his twin brother.
“Go for the throat Rosalie,” he shouted at the little girl who took a moment to smile at Reade. Clearly he was an object of affection for her. She paid dearly for her crush since Renny slammed one right by her. The crowd roared its disapproval but he flipped them off which created a whole new uproar. It was hilarious.
Rosalie turned back to the game with a furious scowl and hunkered down to play. She quickly won the next two volleys. At first I thought Renny was letting her win. Nope. She was beating him fair and square, and he was good. She was just better. Light on her feet, quick, eyes darting to and fro and she seemed to know just what his every move would be.
She slammed the last one right past him on to the very tip of the back right corner and threw down her paddle, jumping up and down. This was the first time she had a childlike expression. She ran into Reade’s arms who spun her around as they screamed together. Renny ambled over to me and dropped to the grass, head shaking from side to side.
“I don’t know how she does it,” he said. I rubbed his head like a fuzzy doggie and murmured condolences.
Reade brought Rosalie over to meet me and to shake Renny’s hand.
“You owe me five bucks,” she said to him, holding out her hand.
“You bet her,” Reade guffawed, “what an