Home Fires by Gene Wolfe Read Free Book Online

joking? Are you sure? You didn’t just glimpse someone who looked like her?”
    “I—I hugged her.” For a moment Chelle was silent. “That was after we’d talked for a minute or two. She … She said to call her Virginia. Virginia Healy. That’s what they call her here, she said.”
    “Which worries you, as it should.”
    “I want a drink.” Chelle rose, posing. “I was hours and hours in the spa. Don’t you think I look pretty?”
    “Lovely. You glow.”
    “That means sweat, and I did. I want a cold drink and something to eat. Do we have to go to the dining salon?”
    “No, and it would be better not to.” Skip took out his phone. “I’ll call food service, and that will give you time to think over what you want to say.”
    “I know what I want to say. I’m trying to decide how I feel. You brought—not now. I want something tall and tropical, icy cold, with fruit juices and rum.”
    “How about the umbrella?”
    “Tell them they can keep it.” Chelle sat again. “I want a club sandwich, too. A big one.”
    “Anything else?”
    “A teddy bear. Never mind, you’re my teddy bear. I hold you and feel comforted. And safe. Pretty soon I’ll stop hitting the dirt when I hear a loud noise.”
    Skip smiled and ordered.
    “Let me start like this. I didn’t hate her today.”
    “I never thought you did.”
    “Sorry, but you’re wrong. Furthermore I told you about it that time in the restaurant.”
    “I didn’t believe you.”
    “You should have, because it was true. Before I went into the Army, Vanessa was a bitch with stardrive. God knows my father had his faults, he drank too much and he cheated on her, but he never molested me and he was semi-nice. Vanessa should’ve been a Halloween costume. Nothing was ever right unless she did it. Nobody was good enough for me, and Charlie certainly wasn’t good enough for her—she had married beneath her, and let that be a lesson to me. Didn’t you notice that I never brought you home to meet my folks?”
    Staring out at the rolling green Atlantic, Skip said, “Actually, I didn’t. I should have.”
    “Why doesn’t the food come?”
    “I suppose because it’s not ready. How’s the spa?”
    “Small but good. The masseur’s a big black lady they call Trinity. It’s where she was born, she says. They ought to be Swedes, but she’s good and she’s got arms like a weight lifter. I liked her, and I think she liked me. Her brother’s a soldier.”
    “What about the rest?”
    “You haven’t said a word about my hair. Is it me?”
    “Not quite, but it will be.”
    She fluffed her golden curls with both hands. “Could our children be blonds, Skip? Any of them?”
    “I didn’t know we were going to have any.”
    “We are. That’s not negotiable. If you don’t like them, we can put them up for adoption.” Chelle paused. “Only I think I’d rather keep them. I’ll be a bad mother, though.”
    “You’ll be a wonderful mother.”
    “Because I had a bad role model.” Her voice fell. “Only I couldn’t hate her today. I—well, I just don’t know. I tried.”
    “You shouldn’t.”
    “Shouldn’t hate or shouldn’t try?”
    “Both. We’ve got to hate when we can’t help hating. It’s legitimate then, because we can’t help it. The other thing is the essence of evil.”
    She grinned, happy with the change of subject. “Isn’t it supposed to be the love of money? Charlie used to say that.”
    “Nine times out of ten, the love of money makes people work harder and do a better job.”
    “Yeah. I guess so. Or fear does. Like when we were digging in. People worked until—you wouldn’t believe it. Fear made me clean up my room when I was a kid. Fear of what Mother was going to say and keep on saying. Saying over and over again, with no forgiveness. Not ever. I was afraid of how she’d look and how she’d scream and keep on screaming. I couldn’t help hating her. Can you understand that?”
    Picturing the scene, Skip nodded.