House of Many Tongues by Jonathan Garfinkel Read Free Book Online

whatever you want. (a beat) Tell me about her. What colour is Yuad’s hair?
    Abu Dalo: My cousin Bashir. We grew up together in Ramallah. When we were kids he’d smash the heads of frogs with bricks from the construction site and laugh.
    Shabak Agent: (laughs) That’s gross.
    Abu Dalo: He’s disgusting and he’s what’s wrong with my people.
    Dr. Jihad with his four wives, all wearing hijab.
    Fourteen masked men with AK-47s by his side.
    A real religious fanatic.
    Shabak Agent: You have my sympathies.
    Abu Dalo: I don’t want your sympathy. I want him arrested.
    He organized the suicide bomb at the Tel Aviv disco.
    Shabak Agent: We know that, Abu Dalo. We’re Shabak.
    Abu Dalo: Yeah, but I know where he lives.
    Believe me, I hate you. I want a Palestinian homeland. But I can’t support some fundamentalist asshole who kills children in my name. Fatah or Hamas: if we’re not stealing from our own people we’re blowing up innocents like those kids at the disco.
    Shabak Agent: I get it.
    Abu Dalo: I want to see my wife again. I want her in a new dress, on clean sheets, on a new bed, in my old house in Jerusalem. I want my house back.
    Shabak Agent: We won’t just arrest your cousin you know.
    Abu Dalo: I know.
    Shabak Agent: You’ll have to do it yourself. Lure him out. Bring him to us. Dead.
    Abu Dalo: I know.
    Shabak Agent: You’ll have to work for us for the next five years.
    Abu Dalo: I know my friends in the jail are watching, I know what they are thinking. I know.
    Shabak Agent: Drink the coffee.
    Back to the present.
    Shimon: Drink it.
    Abu Dalo: No!
    Shimon: Take care of her. Drink the coffee.
    Abu Dalo: I hate your coffee. I hate your water. I hate this house. I hate everything you’ve touched.
    Shimon: (A beat. ABU DALO takes the coffee but doesn’t drink.) Please. Drink my coffee. I promise to make it better next time.
    Your daughter can stay here as long as you help me finish this book.
    Abu Dalo: I detest your pity.

Scene 2
    Enter THE CAMEL and THE HOUSE. ALEX and SUHA digging. SUHA can hear THE HOUSE but not ALEX. ALEX and SUHA cannot hear THE CAMEL.
    THE CAMEL sings his heart out. Leonard Cohen.
    The House: Try it with a bit more longing.
    The Camel: This is a complete waste of time.
    The House: I need you to sing so the kids can hear.
    Suha: The walls are full of mould. You people never took care of this place.
    Alex: You and I could clean it up. Together. If you want.
    Suha: Screw off.
    The Camel: This isn’t helping at all.
    The House: The kids will fall in love. They’ll break the impasse between the old men. They’ll live like a family.
    They’ll be a family.
    (to SUHA) Hello? Excuse me? Hello?
    Suha: Who the hell is that?
    The House: It’s me. The house.
    SUHA stops digging.
    Suha: Oh. You talk. I heard about a talking house once. It was in Nablus.
    The Israelis bulldozed it, of course.
    Suha as Groucho: They like to bulldoze. They’re like little boys with their toys in the sandbox.
    SUHA resumes digging.
    Suha: They’ll bulldoze you, too.
    The Camel: She’s a real sweetheart.
    The House: Sing. (to SUHA) You need to stop digging.
    Suha: I’m burying my mother. (to ALEX) Dig, kike. (He does.)
    Alex: Do you like sandboxes?
    Suha: Piss off.
    Alex: I used to have a sandbox when I was a kid.
    Once I dug so deep I actually made it to China. (a beat)
    I’m much stronger than I look.
    Suha: You are incredibly annoying.
    Alex: You’re annoyingly incredible.
    Suha: Shut up and dig!
    The Camel: She couldn’t fall in love if you paid her.
    The House: When people disagree it means they care. Life!
    (to SUHA) This is a house for the living. Burials require special permission.
    Suha: (to THE HOUSE) I’m doing this because my mother wanted to be buried here. I wanted to grant her final wish.
    The House: Then it’ll cost you.
    Suha: How much?
    The House: Oh, I sense a negotiation coming. I like a good negotiation.
    The Camel: You’re beautiful when you negotiate.
    The House: Show me your hands.