I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris Read Free Book Online

story told by one of my favorite preachers, Ravi Zacharias, clearly
    31 illustrates the choice we face. One day a boy who has a bag of marbles proposes a trade with a little girl who has a bag of candy. The girl gladly agrees. But while the boy gets out his marbles, he realizes that he can't bear to part with some of them. Rather dishonestly, he takes three of his best marbles and hides them under his pillow. The boy and girl make the trade, and the girl never knows he has cheated her. But that night while the girl lies fast asleep, the boy has no peace. He's wide awake, pondering a question that nags him: "I wonder if she kept her best candy, too?"
    Like that little boy, many of us walk through life plagued by the question "Has God given me His best?" But the question that we must answer first is "Am I giving God my best?"
    You and I will never experience God's best--in singleness or in marriage--until we give God our all. We've held onto old attitudes, foolishly clutching a lifestyle that the world tells us will bring fulfillment. God asks us to hand them all over to Him.
    Where are you right now? Have you given God everything within you, or do you still hold your favorite marbles in your hands, including your attitude about dating?
    In the following chapters we'll examine our attitudes toward three heart issues--love, patience, and purity--that shape our approach to relationships. As we seek to gain God's perspective, we'll discover that giving Him everything is well worth the trade.
    part Two THE HEART of the MATTER chapter four Looking Up "Love" in God's Dictionary
    learning the true definition of love
    "You did what?" I asked in disbelief. Jeff laughed loudly and accelerated the car as we went around a turn. My shock apparently energized him. "Gloria told her mom she was staying at her friends house, and we rented a room at a hotel Friday night," he said as if it were no big deal.
    Though he hardly seemed old enough to be driving, my sixteen-year-old friend was acting as my chauffeur during the summer weeks I spent at my grandmothers home in Ohio. Our parents had known each other since the couples were newlyweds; we had pictures playing together as preschoolers.
    Jeff and his girlfriend, Gloria, had been going out for a while. If you didn't count the numerous times they had broken up then reconciled, they had dated for almost a year. Jeff had always remained vague
    32 about their level of physical involvement, but now they had obviously fully consummated their relationship.
    "We got a room at the Holiday Inn in Dayton," he explained as he put his hand out the window into the cool night air. Turning to me he grinned, winked mischievously, and said, "Man, oh, man."
    56 joshua harris
    "I can't believe you," I said, letting the tone of my voice convey my disapproval. "You mean you and Gloria had...y had.. .1 mean you slept together?"
    Jeff could tell I wasn't pleased. He wanted me to be impressed, to slap him on the back like one of his football teammates in the locker room and praise him for his "exploit." I wanted to slap him all right, but not on the back.
    "Look, Josh," he said defensively, "we've waited a long time for this. It was really special. Maybe it doesn't meet your morals, but we felt that it was the right time to show our love."
    "My morals?" I said indignantly. "My morals? Since when were they mine? How many times have we talked about this? With each other? At church? Jeff, you know that wasn't right. You..."
    "We love each other," Jeff said, cutting me off in mid sentence. "If you ever really fall in love, then you'll understand."
    The conversation ended. For some reason the stoplight took forever to turn green. We sat silently as the turn signal clicked off and on. I looked out the window.
    Four years later, Jeff was going to college in Michigan. "I'm engaged!" he told me over the phone. "Debbie is incredible. I've never been so in love."
    "That's great," I said. My congratulations sounded hollow. I