If I Fall by Anna Cruise Read Free Book Online Page B

much of anything.
    Aidan grinned and lifted the lid, exposing a collection of thin, hand-rolled cigarettes. “Wanna get high?”
    They weren't cigarettes and he was right. After weakly protesting, I choked my way through a joint with him. I coughed and sputtered as the smoke seared my throat and burned my lungs. I didn't let myself worry about what I was doing, just sucked on the rolled up piece of paper. And pretty soon, everything became clear in a fuzzy, unimportant sort of way. I felt calm and silly, relaxed and alert. My jaw muscles ached from smiling so much.
    “ See, I told you,” he said in a smug voice.
    We were both laying down now, staring at the ceiling as we talked.
    “Just think if Obama and Bin Laden had shared a smoke. The war on terror would have been over , man.”
    I giggled. He was gorgeous and brilliant. And funny and sweet. And I forgave him completely. I told him this, throwing my arms around him as I said so.
    “I'm glad.” He nuzzled my ear. “You're pretty hot, too. I love this,” he said, burying his face in my hair. “And your eyes. Reminds me of chocolate.”
    My mood shifted and I nudged his head up so I could kiss him.
    “Good God, Gigi,” he murmured, his hands weaving through my hair.
    I pulled away. “Gigi?”
    His smile was like an angel's. “You. My nickname for you. Good Girl. Gigi.”
    I reached for him again. “I don't like nicknames. And I'm not feeling like much of a good girl right now.”
    “Yeah,” he said as his hand closed over my breast and he lowered his mouth toward mine. “I noticed.”
    I let him touch me and do all of the things he did to me at Scotty's house. I didn't think about it this time. I just let him do it. And I didn't know if it was the joint I'd just smoked or the mood I was in, or the fact that I just wanted to escape from my life, but it was better the second time around. A thousand percent better.

ELEVEN

    The sun was disappearing behind the thick marine layer that hung over the ocean when Aidan dropped me off. I grabbed my Coke from the cup holder in his car and leaned over to kiss him goodbye.
    “ Thanks for dinner,” I said.
    We'd stopped at Alberto's and gorged ourselves on rolled tacos and quesadillas. Mexican food had never tasted so good.
    “No problem.” He stroked my leg, his thumb rubbing gently along my thigh as he kissed me again. “I'll see you tomorrow.”
    I ignored the sign in the yard and let myself into the darkened house. A light was on in my mom's room. It shot a thin beam from under her door, casting an eerie glow in the hallway. I hesitated for just a moment, wondering if I should approach. Knock or tell her I was home or something. But then the light flickered off and my decision was made for me. I stopped in the kitchen to dump out my drink. The light on the answering machine blinked twice in rapid succession. I hit the play button.
    “Megan. It's Dad. We're back from Miami. Give me a call.”
    I deleted it.
    “Megan?” Jada's voice. High-pitched. Worried. “What's going on? Why haven't you called me? Are you OK? I left messages on your cell. I'm worried!”
    I sighed. I needed to call her. I hadn't talked to her since Friday afternoon. But, truthfully, I had nothing to say to her. Nothing I could say. I imagined the conversation we'd have.
    “ How was your date? Your weekend?” she would ask.
    “ Great,” I'd say.
    “ What did you do?”
    “ Well, let's see,” I'd respond. “Got drunk off my ass with Jello shots, lost my virginity in some stranger's bed, smoked a joint with Aidan today and then slept with him again. Oh, and there's a For Sale sign up in my yard because my dad is selling our house. How was your weekend?”
    It didn't go exactly that way. She answered on the first ring and I hemmed and hawed as I answered her questions, offering apologies for not getting in touch sooner. I told her about the sign in the yard, seizing upon it as an excuse for not calling. She was understanding,