In the Face of Darkness (Lily Culpepper Book 1) by Sarah Dell Read Free Book Online

will become dangerous”.
    “I have her under control” Endora said.
    “For now” Castor said.  “What happens when she discovers what she is?” Castor asked.  “What happens if she discovers how to use her powers?” he asked.
    “That won’t happen” Endora said.  “What happened tonight was a fluke.  You just have to give me more time” she said.
    “I don’t have more time to give you” Castor said.  “The Queen wants to meet her, and not even I can defy the Queen” he said.  I waited until I heard both Castor and Endora go up to their rooms before I went up to mine.
    I wondered about what I had overheard Castor say.  I had always known that Endora wanted to control me, but I didn’t understand what she meant about my having potential or what Castor meant about me being dangerous.  Never would I have thought I would hear someone call me dangerous.
    I wondered why someone as powerful as Castor would be afraid of me.  I wasn’t a threat to anyone.  I couldn’t even make a kill.  I looked at myself in the mirror and I tried to see myself under the makeup and clothes that didn’t feel like me.  It didn’t matter how long I looked in the mirror, I couldn’t see the girl I used to be.  It wasn’t just the clothes or the makeup, it was me.  It was in my eyes; they were the same color and they looked the same, but they were cold and unfeeling.  There was nothing I could do to change them back.
    I looked deep into the green eyes that I inherited from my father.  I desperately wanted to see something in those eyes that would remind me of the person that I used to be.  This life had taken everything that I used to be and still it wanted more.  It wanted something I didn’t think I could give.  It wanted the very last shred of humanity that was left inside me.
    If I could just give into the darkness then maybe it wouldn’t hurt as much.  Maybe I could feel like Tino and Endora and maybe I wouldn’t care anymore.  I just wanted to feel the way I used to feel.  I didn’t want to embrace the darkness, but I didn’t have a choice.
    I cursed Jane.  If it weren’t for her I would have given in to the darkness and killed one of the other girls by now.  I had been prepared to kill before her assault distracted me.  I blamed her for making me stop and think about the kill.  She had said that I was no different from the other vampires in the room, and she had been right; but I didn’t want to be like the other vampires.  I didn’t want to kill anyone.  I wanted to be the person I used to be.  I wanted to be the girl with friends whose only worry was whether or not someone would ask me to the prom. 
    It wasn’t like I was making a difference by not killing.  Every one of those girls died, and it didn’t matter if I killed them or not.  If I didn’t make a kill soon, Endora would have no choice but to put a stake in my heart.
    I don’t know why, but just then I thought about Matthias and his promise to take me away.  I laughed at the thought.  Did he really think he could save me from this life?  He apparently had never dealt with vampires.  No vampire could ever be free from their masters, and if their master died the blood bond would just be passed to another vampire.
    I only managed to put Matthias out of my mind by thinking about the meeting with the Queen.  I always knew that if I lived as a vampire long enough I would have to meet the Queen, but I had hoped that it wouldn’t be for a long time.  From what I knew about the Queen she was not to be taken lightly.  She had taken control of the vampire council during World War I, and she was not well liked.
    I needed to understand what potential Endora and Castor thought I possessed, and I needed to understand what Castor had said about me discovering what I am.  I didn’t understand why I was so important to both Endora and Matthias.  There was more to this story that I didn’t know.  I had to find out what everyone