Kiss My Name by Calvin Wade Read Free Book Online

a stupid reason to delay a holiday to me!”
    “Geoff, if I’d have suggested going on a narrow boat when the World Cup was on, you’d have moaned like hell about that!”
    “Deidre, I didn’t even watch the bloody final! I hate the Argies and the Germans anyway and Maradona only won that World Cup because he cheated his way through. I always say to the girls when we play Monopoly, better to lose than to win by cheating. That law doesn’t just apply to Monopoly, you know, it applies to life... and to World Cups too!”
    Deidre’s neck flushes red when she gets annoyed. I noticed it had gone pink.
    “Geoff, if I’d have said we were going on a boat with no tele when England were playing, you’d have done your nut in!”
    To be fair, she was right. I calmed down a bit. We’ve always had a fiery relationship and this could have been a springboard to a massive row, but Deidre seemed keen on going on the narrow boat so I was not going to upset her that night. She’s a fiery redhead, is Deidre, but that’s not a bad thing, I wouldn’t want to be married to a pushover. The fact that she was a strong, determined lady was what attracted me to her in the first place, that and the fact her arse looked good in jeans!
    “Fair enough, love. We could go a few weeks into the summer holidays this year, if that’s what you want. You like the idea of going away in a boat though? It’s going to be brilliant, love. A holiday the girls will always remember.”
    “There’s only one little thing that puts me off.”
    “What’s that, love?”
    “Is that not how Natalie Wood died?”
                  Deidre was into Hart to Hart and when she was younger her favourite film had been West Side Story. I can still remember watching the news with her on BBC when they said Natalie Wood had died and it freaked her out a little. Natalie Wood was only a couple of years older than Deidre and me, so incidents like that hit you hard. They make you feel more aware of your own mortality.
    “Dee, she was in a dinghy in California, love, not on a narrow boat in Yorkshire.”
    “I know that Geoff, but I just mean, will it be safe for the kids?”
                  I put my burger into the brown roll that Deidre had put on my plate. She always gave me brown rolls, I preferred white, but Deidre said brown ones were better for me. Burgers and chips from the deep fat fryer were no doubt doing my arteries the power of good too!
    “Dee, both the girls are good swimmers, we’ll keep an eye on them and we’ll make sure they wear life jackets whilst they are up on deck.”
    I don’t drink a lot these days, now I’m a pensioner. Just the odd shandy and the occasional glass of brandy, but back then I used to drink a fair bit. It was not unusual for me to get through six or seven cans on a week night. Up until this point this had obviously been an unspoken concern. Deidre face formed a frown.
    “I don’t want you drinking much, Geoff. I wouldn’t be comfortable on a boat if you’re knocking back the Carling Black Labels and the Oranjebooms, every five minutes.”
                  I haven’t a clue where Deidre got the idea that I drank Oranjeboom from! Maybe it was just that advert that was on, (‘Oranjeboom, Oranjeboom, it’s a lager not a tune!) or maybe one of the fellas brought Oranjeboom around when they came to watch the Quarter Final when that four feet tall Argie was out jumping Shilts. Not drinking was a sacrifice that I was willing to make to go narrow boating though, I promised I would only drink a couple of cans a day.
                  On Saturday 16 th August, 1986, a bright, sunny, summer’s day, Deidre, Sarah, Joanne and I climbed aboard our narrow boat, “Monty’s Miracle”, in Silsden, West Yorkshire and began cruising west. We had been given over an hour’s induction regarding the facilities on board and how to operate the locks. I’m a pretty practical sort of guy and Deidre is