loose by Unknown Read Free Book Online

smiles.
    “Really?” He stands. “I’ll get you some chairs.”
    I breathe out, relieved, and we smile at the other two, Danny and Case. Peter comes back with chairs, and we set our drinks on the table and sit.
    “So, what grade are you guys in?” Case asks. He has light brown hair and a long nose.
    We tell them.
    “I recognize you,” Danny says to me. “You’re new this year.”
    I nod, feeling good. He knows about me. I’m noticeable. I take a long sip of my drink and light up a cigarette. As I blow out I look right at Peter.
    “How long have you guys been here?” I ask.
    Peter looks back at me. His eyes are a pale blue, and his blond hair hangs over them. He lights up a cigarette too. I put a finger to my lips, wanting him to think about them, to imagine kissing me.
    “I don’t know,” he says. “A few hours.”
    “Let’s do something,” I say. I look at Amy and she smiles.
    “We could go to the park,” she says, referring to Central Park.

    •
37 •
    L o o s e G i r l
    “Nah.” Danny downs the rest of his beer. His dark curls are cut close to his head, but he runs a hand over them as though they are long. “We can go to my place.”
    I look at Peter. He shrugs and finishes his beer too. My heart picks up pace again as the five of us leave the bar and walk to Danny’s car, a white Honda. He opens the back door and Amy and I climb in. To my delight, Peter climbs in after me. I lift my leg slightly, so it will look thinner, and then I press it, just barely, against Peter’s. He glances at me, but I keep my eyes straight ahead. I don’t want to overwhelm him. I want him to come to me.
    We drive through the city streets and head over the bridge, Led Zeppelin’s “Immigrant Song” blaring from the radio. The boys laugh at private jokes, and Amy and I smile at each other. We’re getting what we wanted. I mouth to her, “Peter is mine.”
    She raises her eyebrows. “Good luck,” she mouths back.
    Danny turns off an exit and down some side roads and we slow in front of a moderate-sized house. We follow him inside and go straight to his bedroom.
    “Where are your parents?” Amy asks.
    “Asleep.” Danny throws a bunch of clothes off his unmade bed.
    “Just don’t get too loud.”
    Case laughs, hearing the sexual innuendo. I laugh too, looking right at Peter.
    Peter sits on a beanbag chair on the floor, and I sit against the wall beside him, trying to figure out how to get him alone. Danny puts a Doors album on, and when he leaves the room to find beer in the kitchen, I get an idea.
    “I need a cigarette,” I say softly, just to Peter. “Come with me?”
    “Where?” I can’t read his expression. Is he hesitating? Does he not want to be alone with me?
    “Is there a deck? Or on the front stoop. I don’t know.” I stand up, close to him, so he can feel the heat from my legs. I see him glance at them briefly.

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38 •
    A H o u s e w i t h N o M e n
    “I guess I could go for a cigarette,” he says, and I know I have him. He stands and as we walk out of the room, I smile slyly at Amy.
    Look at me, I’m thinking. Getting Peter Rafferty alone.
    I follow Peter to sliding doors that lead to a deck. Danny sees us on his way back to his bedroom but says nothing. This gives me some hope. Maybe he expected Peter to want to be intimate with me, away from the others. It is a chilly spring night. I hold my jean jacket closed. I pull out a cigarette, hand one to Peter, and he lights them.
    The night is clear, a half moon glowing in a corner of the sky. Stars sprinkle above the dark trees in Danny’s backyard. That discomfort kicks in again, the wondering and waiting. I take a drag and try to think of something to say, something that will cut into my anxiety.
    “Tenth grade, huh,” Peter says. I smile, relieved he spoke first.
    “Is there a problem with that?”
    He smiles too. “I don’t really spend time with sophomores.”
    “You’re too good for us.”
    He shrugs. “I didn’t say