Losing You: a prequel to It's Not Over by Melissa M. Marlow Read Free Book Online Page B

with no argument I went home to shower before heading back to sit by her door. 
    Matt’s edginess made me nervous as he followed me around the apartment waiting for my melt down.  Determined not to let that happen again, I put on my coat to head back when my phone buzzed.  When I pulled it out Matt and I shared in the triumph that the flowers had somehow worked on Jess.  My blood rushed through my body sending a tingling sensation to my extremities.
    It was a single text from her, which happened to be better than nothing at all until I read it , “Thanks for remembering this time.”
    My knees hit the floor when the air escaped my lungs.  She’s gone and nothing I do will change that.  I had neglected her needs for so long there’s nothing left in her heart for me.
    Lying in bed not realizing how it came to be that I never made it back to Jess’s room.  Confusion filled my head why I didn’t have her here in my arms professing my last love.  Matt barged in, “Paul, you either have to stop this or get her to see you.  I can’t watch this anymore.  Why do you have to be so over the top about one girl?”
    The text from last night filled my brain and that deep gut wrenching twist of lost ripped at my insides.
    Matt pulled me to my feet, “I will not allow you to do this to yourself.  Get up and do something Paul.”
    On my feet I followed him pleading, “Matt, can you talk to her.  Tell her anything she wants to hear.  I need your help!”
    He walked out the door.  If he talked to her it might help, but it seemed that I had to do this myself.  If I heard her voice it might help me a little.  I picked up the phone left on Jess’s message from last night.  Though I didn’t break down like I had last night it still burned deep in my heart.
    I decided that her voice with direction to leave her a message would have to be enough for now.  Calling her number, waiting for it to pick up after several rings, I just needed to hear her voice.
    Completely surprised that she picked up, but she didn’t say hello either.  What was she doing?  Did she want me to beg?
    “Jess?”
    “Um, no.  Is this Paul?”
    “Yes, who is this?”
    “It’s Karlie.  I thought you agreed to give her space.”
    “I am.  I just expected to get the voice service.  Why are you answering her phone?”
    The line seemed eerie quiet.  She wanted to tell me something but didn’t want to at the same time.
    “Paul she doesn’t carry her phone anymore.  The only time I see her with it is when she calls home, and last night.”
    All my questions came out in a rolling wave, because Karlie wanted to help me.  “Is she okay?  Did the flowers help?  Is she going to see me now?  I can’t take this much longer.”
    “Um.  That’s the reason I answered the phone.  I am a little worried; she has a meeting with the administrator this morning.”
    “When?”
    “She just left.”
    “Is she having problems with classes?”
    “I don’t think so.  All she does is study.  I think she’s doing better than the first quarter.”
    “Is it money?”
    “Honestly Paul, she doesn’t talk to anyone anymore.  She hardly eats.  And most of the time I can’t sleep in my room because I can’t stand hearing her crying all time.”
    If she would just see me I’d take all the sadness away from her, “She cries a lot?”
    “That would be an understatement.  Last night she didn’t sleep at all.  She sat in the window cell and cried all night holding one tulip.”
    Trying to process her reaction in my head jumbled together.  She’s done with me forever, but I wasn’t letting her go.  I made it harder on her.  I had no intention of hurting her further, but my protective side sent me to the Administrator’s office.  I called Theo on my way there.
    “Hey, what’s up kid?”
    “You could have told me she was here.”
    “What?”
    “She has been here all year and I just find out about it.”
    “Paul, she was planning a