Louise Rennison_Georgia Nicolson 08 by Love Is a Many Trousered Thing Read Free Book Online Page B

then?”
    I said with great dignitosity, “He is on my list.”
    I thought I heard Jas say, “Tart.” Which is unnecessary. And also at some time will cost her a quick plunge into the nearest ditch. Maybe if I am forced to go on the ridiculous camping fiasco, I can think of an amusing revenge involving twigs and her pants.
    home
    Anyway, I am going to get this camping thing outof the way so that I can just concentrate on my love life.
    I wonder why I still haven’t heard anything from Masimo. It’s been three whole days now. And no one seems to have seen him.
    two minutes later
    What does it say in the How to Make Any Twit Fall in Love with You book? I’m just going to open it randomly and see what it says.
    one minute later
    â€œBoys live mostly in their heads.” What is that supposed to mean? I wouldn’t live in my head, I can tell you that. It’s full of rubbish.
    one minute later
    Ooohhh well, I can only think of one cake at a time, my hands are full (oo-er).
    6:00 p.m.
    What is the matter with my parents? They will not do the least thing for me. I simply asked my vati to send a letter saying that I could not go on the school trip to a field because we had planned to dosomething as a family.
    Vati said, “We haven’t planned anything.”
    I said patiently, “I know that, Vati, it is merely a cunning ploy.”
    â€œYou mean a lie.”
    â€œYes, exactly…er, I mean, well, not really, you see what it is is that I am allergic to the countryside.”
    Vati, as usual when he is intellectually challenged, resorted to coarse and unnecessary language.
    â€œYou do talk absolute bollocks, Georgia.”
    That is a nice way to talk to a sensitive growing teenager, isn’t it? No wonder my hair won’t go right and I am almost constantly in detention. Then he walked out of the room. I followed him. Was he wearing hipster jeans or was it just that his bottom was growing?
    I decided not to ask.
    â€œDad…”
    â€œGeorgia, you are going on the field trip. We can take Libby to Grandad’s and then your mum and I can have some time to ourselves for once.”
    â€œMum doesn’t want time with you, you will only talk about rubbish and set fire to your farts and soon. Please please don’t make me go. I may die in the forest eaten by voles.”
    â€œGood.”
    6:30 p.m.
    God I am so tense. I’ve spent precious makeup sex-minxy time trying to talk some sense into my father and now I have only an hour to get ready for the Sex God. I must concentrate.
    6:32 p.m.
    How do I feel about meeting Robbie? I had eschewed him with a firm hand. And now he wants to shake my hand, and put my hand…Shut up about hands! Stop going on and on about hands!! Be a hands-free zone!!!
    Oh brilliant news, my brain has popped off on an away day to Loonchester!
    6:35 p.m.
    I’ve put really loud music on to drown out my brain whilst I do my makeup. I wonder whether he will have a Kiwi-a-gogo accent. He will probably say “Gidday cobbler” or whatever it is they say.
    I’ve got this stuff that you paint on your lipstick and it makes it stay on, even through snogging. I tried snogging my arm in a very passionate way and it remained lippy-free. So resultio !!!
    one minute later
    But I don’t know why I’m bothered about snogging because I might just be drinking coffee.
    I wonder if I put the stuff on my eyeliner it would stop it coming off as well. Sometimes when I go to the loo after dancing like a loon I look like Polly the Panda.
    7:10 p.m.
    Ow buggery bugger. It’s like putting paint stripper on your eyelid.
    Ow.
    My eyes will probably all swell up now. I must keep them very wide open.
    7:15 p.m.
    I’ve got my blue leather skirt and black top on and my ankle boots. I might take a jacket just in case he wants to er…wander about in the woods or something.
    My hands are shaking so much I can’t do the buttons up.
    I