sure? That’s a tough job, Ella. It’s not even something a lot of men can do. There’s a lot of monotony, and a lot of instability. And it’s not safe out there for a woman, especially not a tiny little thing like you.”
“I’m not tiny,” I bristled. “I took karate when I was younger. I’m sure I could defend myself.”
Paul shook his head. He started to chuckle, but when he saw my murderous glare, he stopped. “Okay,” he said. “So you want to start trucking. Why? What happened?”
I shrugged and rolled my eyes at once. “I don’t know,” I said finally. “Everything. Everything happened. I got kicked out of school and I can’t keep a bartending job because I don’t flirt back and I can’t keep a waitressing job because I’m not sweet enough, and no one can hire me for anything else. I have no skills. I know how to drive, though.”
Paul gave me a long, hard look. “Are you capable of taking care of yourself for long periods of time? That’s a necessary thing in this industry,” he said. “But if you are, you’ll be good to go. Just need to keep yourself focused and on the job.”
I nodded. “I can do that,” I said. “And I have a plan. I don’t want to drive a truck forever, but I need to go back to college. I’ve always wanted to go to med school and be a doctor, and this is the only way I can pay for tuition.”
Paul nodded. “It’s good to have an end game when you go into something like this,” he said. “That’s good, that’s real good. I’m proud of you, honey. I know your parents would be proud, too.”
Tears pricked at my eyes and I had to look away. “I don’t know about that,” I said finally. “I feel like such a failure.”
“You’re not a failure, honey,” Paul said. “I’ll help you get back on your feet. You know I still own my rig out there?” He pointed to the side yard and I saw a gigantic semi truck parked next to his tiny little house. “I’d be willing to let you rent it from me, for as long as you need.”
My jaw dropped. “Are you kidding me? I can’t believe that!” I squealed. But after a moment, I realized that I couldn’t take him up on his generosity like that. It was too much; there was no way I could accept something so huge.
“She’s yours,” Paul said with a grin. “What’s wrong?”
“I can’t take that,” I said miserably. “What if something happened? I’d be responsible.”
Paul gave me a serious look. “I have insurance,” he said. “Everything would be taken care of. We could come up with just enough for you to feel like you were actually helping me out. How does that sound?”
I shook my head. “It still feels like too big of an offer,” I told him truthfully. “I’m just not sure I deserve it at this point in life. And besides, I haven’t even gotten into medical school yet.”
“You will. I promise. I’ll help you.”
I frowned. “What are you talking about? What do you know about medical school?”
Paul laughed and I blushed when I realized how rude I’d sounded. “I don’t know anything about it,” he admitted gruffly. “But I know how to help people study. I helped your Ma when she was going for her realtor’s license, and she passed with flying colors.”
I swallowed hard. “Okay,” I said suddenly, feeling scared and excited and anxious at once. “Okay. Let’s do it.”
The next six months I’d spent living with Paul. He tried to offer me the room rent-free, but I wouldn’t take that, so instead I helped him out with cooking and cleaning. His arthritis was getting too bad to do too much around the house, so I was happy to take over and make things nice, clean, and homey for him. Truth be told, I wasn’t much of a cook, but Paul loved baked ziti and roasted chicken breast, and thankfully I could make both of those dishes. After I was done with the chores at the end of the day, I’d sit down with my
Learning to Kill: Stories