Mapping the Edge by Sarah Dunant Read Free Book Online Page B

both.”
    â€œI see. So why are you here now?”
    â€œYou didn’t leave a phone number on the message. I thought I should at least tell you myself.”
    He smiled as if to make it clear that he didn’t believe her, but it didn’t matter that much. “Well, so now you have. Thank you.”
    An unexpected breeze came through the half-open window and rippled across the blinds. The shadow stripes on the floor seemed to grow and shrink with the waves of light. She knew it was her turn to talk, but she didn’t know what to say.
    â€œI thought we’d worked all this through, Anna,” he said gently. “I thought what was happening between us was okay.”
    â€œYeah, well, so did I. But it isn’t.” And her voice was suddenly fierce. “I shouldn’t be here. If I stay any longer I’ll miss my plane.”
    â€œListen,” he said, so quietly she had to strain to hear him. “This isn’t your fault. It’s not anybody’s fault. It just happened.”
    She shook her head. “That’s not true. We made it happen.” She made an angry noise in her throat. “Do you do this?” she said suddenly. “Is this what you do? In the past, is this what you do?”
    He laughed out loud. “What—you want me to lie to you as well as her? Okay. Yes, I do this all the time. Start something casual and then push it till it gets out of hand.” He stopped. “You’re not the only one who thought about not coming, you know. This one has broken my rules too.”
    â€œI thought you said there were no rules. Wasn’t that what you told me on that first night?”
    â€œYeah, well: you know first nights. . . . Come on, Anna, don’t make me the bad guy in this. It’s not how it is.”
    She closed her eyes. “Shit,” she whispered.
    She didn’t move. What was she waiting for? For him to touch her? If he did, would that make her go or stay?
    He shook his head. “I can’t do it for you. Do you understand? That’s not how it works. You have to make up your own mind.”
    Time passed. She took a step toward him. If she didn’t get back that evening Patricia would take Lily home to stay with her. She would read her a bedtime story and take her to school next morning and Paul would pick her up, as usual. Lily would be fine. She was a happy little girl whose life was filled with people who loved her. She would make recompense later. To everyone. After all, it was only a night or two. And everybody deserves pleasure sometime, a chance to store up summer heat for winters ahead.
    As they came into each other’s physical orbit the heat of their skins burned off the remaining layer of conscience. The air relaxed. Her holdall remained where it was on the floor, the airline ticket tucked coyly into the side pocket.

Home—Saturday early A.M.
    A MID THE SCATTERED papers, letters, bills, and newspaper cuttings on her desk was her Filofax. Almost certainly Paul would have been here before me, looking for names and numbers. If he had found nothing, that was because there had been nothing to find. I picked it up and it fell open at the right page of the diary section, a paper clip marking the spot. The week was empty. There was no mention of any trip, no flight details, no hotel, not even the word “Florence.” How could anything be so sudden or so secret as not to be recorded? I realized after a while that I didn’t know what I was looking for.
    Children can move as silently as animals when they want to. I heard the breath and found her at my side in the same instant. The shock sent a cold wash through my body. She in contrast was warm, nest-ripe with the milky perfume of sleep.
    â€œWhoa . . . hello there. You made me jump.”
    â€œStella,” she said, bleary-eyed.
    â€œYeah. Paul told you I was coming, yes?” She gave a small nod. “You’re up very