Mercury Shrugs by Robert Kroese Read Free Book Online Page A

part,” answered Lucifer. “The key is the—”
    He broke off as a Gurien stumbled into him, having been shoved by Amalech. Without taking his eyes off Azrael, Lucifer gripped Gurien’s throat with his right hand and hurled him back into the fray. The brawl showed no signs of abating; in fact, it seemed to be intensifying. These free-for-alls happened once every few days, and they tended to go on until Azrael put a stop to them. Inside the Balderhaz Cube’s sphere of influence, the demons were incapable of performing miracles, but they remained demons—which is to say, short-tempered, thin-skinned, and capable of absorbing an infinite amount of physical punishment. It wasn’t uncommon for them to literally tear each other’s limbs off over some minor slight. All their wounds would heal eventually, but in the meantime the scene could get pretty gruesome.
    Azrael sighed, observing the escalating violence. “I guess I’d better step in.” Azrael was by far the largest and most intimidating of the demons; he tended to dominate the other demons through sheer force of will.
    “No,” said Lucifer, holding up his hand as Azrael took a step toward the fracas. “This is our chance.”
    As the melee went on and neither Lucifer nor Azrael showed any signs of stepping in, Malcazar grew impatient. “Get your lackeys under control, Lucifer,” growled the guard, holding his flaming sword in front of him.
    Lucifer waved his hand dismissively toward Malcazar without making eye contact. “Nothing I can do,” he said. “They get rambunctious sometimes.”
    “Then have your enforcer do it,” Malcazar said, pointing the sword at Azrael.
    Azrael glanced at Lucifer, who gave him a slight nod. Azrael sighed. “It’s not my job to keep your inmates quiet, Malcazar,” he said. “Why don’t you try doing your job?”
    “My job ?” Malcazar snapped. “Do you know what I was doing before I got summoned down into this rat hole to babysit you goofballs? I was the head of security for Cravutius’s security detail. Cushiest job in Heaven. Then one day they tell me I’ve got to spend the next hundred years in this mother-loving cave.”
    “Such language, Malcazar!” Lucifer jeered, turning to face the angel. “Careful, boy. If you fall any farther out of the good graces of the Heavenly authorities, they might throw you in here with us.”
    “You wish,” said Malcazar. “In fact, I’ve already filed an appeal to get reassigned. I never should have been stuck down here in the first place. Some kind of bureaucratic snafu. I’ll be out of here in a week.”
    “Not if you can’t keep control of your prisoners,” said Lucifer. “Have you considered that this is a test? Your bosses have this cave under surveillance, you know. They’re watching you right now, wondering when you’re going to get off your ass and do something about this brawl.”
    Malcazar’s eyes went to the ceiling, apparently looking for hidden cameras. Azrael shot a questioning glance at Lucifer, who shook his head. Malcazar returned his attention to the cage. “You in there!” Malcazar he yelled. “Stop that!”
    The demons, oblivious to the command, continued kicking, pummeling, scratching, and choking each other. Pazusu still had Gurien in a headlock and was slowly squeezing him unconscious.
    “Good show,” said Lucifer. “You’ve practically got them eating out of your hand.”
    “I don’t need your commentary, Lucifer,” Malcazar snapped.
    “Nobody needs my commentary,” said Lucifer. “But you have to admit, it adds color. Speaking of which, have you ever seen anyone’s face turn that shade of purple?”
    As they watched, Gurien’s body went limp, but Pazusu continued to squeeze.
    “I heard the Senate was going to summon Gurien for questioning today,” Lucifer remarked to Azrael. “Of course, that’s going to be difficult if his—” As he spoke, Gurien’s head popped off his body, his neck torn in half by Pazusu’s brawny arm.