Mind Lies by Harlow Stone Read Free Book Online Page B

Those memories would put you in a mood.”
    I contemplate before telling her, “Perhaps that is all it was. I don’t know, and I can’t give you the answers now.”
    “I know, Jer. But sometimes I wonder if I should have pushed harder. You never liked talking about your past, and we silently agreed to keep it off-limits, since I didn’t enjoy talking about mine either. But maybe, Jer, maybe I should have pushed. Maybe I could be giving more answers than questions right now.”
    I shake my head. “No matter what, I don’t think it’s your fault. Nor do I blame you.”
    Resolute, she continues with her dinner, and when we finish, she sets the trays aside. “Do you want to tell me what you remember?”
    I settle into the pillows. “Yes.”

Chapter Eight

     
    “In my memories, or dreams, whatever you want to call them, his name is Locklin,” I tell her.
    “I don’t know anyone by that name, babe. What else you got?”
    I smile. “He’s big, broad shouldered. He has inky-dark hair and calls me Lass.” I shoot my eyes her way. “Anything yet?”
    She shakes her head. “No. But he sounds delicious. Keep going.”
    I do.
    I tell her about the coffee shop and the ride on his motorcycle. I tell her about the questions and the time I shared with him in bed. She confirms that eggs Benny is my favorite breakfast. I tell her about his tattoos, his love for Ireland, and his accent.
    I tell her about having rough sex against the door to my apartment above the laundromat.
    “Wait!” She jerks upright in my bed, crosses her legs, and looks at me. “When we met, in our night classes, I told you that you always smelled good, and you told me it was because you lived above a laundromat. Everything you owned always smelled like fresh linen.”
    My heart skips a beat.
    Once.
    Twice.
    I whisper, fearing to lose what I feel is the first bit of progress since I left the hospital.
    “Did I have long hair then?” I ask, smoothing my short hair behind my ears.
    Portia looks as though she’s seen a ghost. She nods and says, “Yeah babe, you did.”
    We break into watery smiles. It may not be everything, but it’s definitely something. It’s one step higher on the staircase reuniting my past and present.
    My watery smile fades as I remember my reason for leaving that apartment. “Were you ever there, or do you know where that apartment is?”
    She shakes her head. “No, I don’t. I remember you coming back after taking some time off. I think it was just a few days after a weekend, or something like that. You said moving took longer than you thought it would. I saw the next apartment, typical building near Draco Street, after we became closer. We didn’t share much back then, Jerri. I think that’s why we worked; we didn’t pry into each other’s lives—but we clicked,” she says, shrugging her shoulders.
    I silently agree with her. She’s to the point. No nonsense. I feel much the same way. After only knowing her for a few days, I understand what she’s telling me.
    Some people work, and some don’t.
    Portia and I—we work.
    “Portia?”
    She leans back into the pillows. “Yeah, Jer?”
    “I was leaving him. He was going to leave and come back after a month or two, and I was planning to be gone by the time he would have gotten back.” I swallow against the impending tears. “I was pregnant.”
    “Oh shit.”
    I nod. “Yeah. Oh shit. Did I give up a child Portia? Did I lose one?”
    Tears glisten in her eyes. She shakes her head. “I don’t know, Jer. I don’t think so. I mean, maybe you lost it? Unless you had it before you met me. But that doesn’t make sense because you told me you moved when we were in class together. You said you planned to be gone before that guy, Lock, would have been back?”
    “Yes. At least, that’s what happens in the dream.”
    “Did you have a belly in the dream?” she quietly asks.
    I shake my head. No.
    “The only thing I can think of is getting ahold of your medical