none . He used to have hair, but it fell out or something. Everybody was buzzing.
Well, not really. People donât buzz. Bees buzz. It would be weird if people buzzed like bees. But we were all talking. Mr. Klutz held up his hand and made a peace sign, which means âshut up.â
âThank you,â he said. âWe have a very special guest at Ella Mentry School today.â
We all buzzed some more. And youâll never believe who walked out on the stage at that moment.
Nobody! Because somebody rolled out on the stage . . . in a wheelchair.
It was Mrs. Ella Mentry!
Ella Mentry is a really old lady who used to teach at our school a million hundred years ago. She must have beena good teacher, because after she retired the school was named after her. Thereâs a big sign on the grass out front that says ELLA MENTRY SCHOOL .
One time when Mrs. Mentry came to our school, things got out of hand and there was a food fight. Pickle chips andmeatballs and burritos and Tater Tots were flying through the air. It was cool.
We gave Mrs. Mentry a standing ovation. A standing ovation is when everybody gets up from their seats and claps their hands. When you stand up and clap your hands, itâs a lot better than when you just sit there and clap your hands. Nobody knows why.
At first I wasnât going to stand up. But all the teachers stood up. Then a few kids stood up. And then a lot more kids stood up. And then I felt like I would look like a dork if I didnât stand up. So I stood up.
While we were clapping, Mr. Klutz dragged out a big, white piece of cardboard.It was about the size of a door.
âMrs. Mentry has brought a gift for the school today,â Mr. Klutz announced.
âSheâs giving us a door ?â I asked. âWhat do we need a door for? We have plenty of doors.â
âItâs not a door , Arlo!â Andrea said, rolling her eyes. She calls me by my real name because she knows I donât like it. âItâs a check . Mrs. Mentry is donating money to our school, dumbhead!â
I wanted to say something mean to Andrea, but all I could think of was âYour face looks like a door.â
In my head, I was wondering why Mrs. Mentryâs check was so big . My parentsuse checks, and their checks are about the size of a dollar bill. Why would anybody need to have a check the size of a door ? I can imagine how big Mrs. Mentryâs wallet is.
Mr. Klutz handed the microphone to Mrs. Mentry.
âThank you for that wonderful welcome,â she said. âI will always have a special place in my heart for this school. And to show my appreciation, I would like to give this to you.â
Mr. Klutz turned the check around so we could see the other side. This is what it looked like. . . .
WHAT!?
âA million dollars!â I shouted.
âA million dollars!!â shouted Alexia.
âA million dollars!!!!â shouted Ryan.
In case you were wondering, we were all shouting, âA million dollars.â
Everybody started yelling and screaming and shrieking and hooting and hollering and generally freaking out. You should have been there!
Nobody could believe Ella Mentry was actually giving the school a million dollars . Man, that lady must have a ton of money to be giving away so much of it. No wonder she needs such big checks. There are a lot of zeroes in a million.
We gave Mrs. Mentry another standingovation. Then Mr. Klutz made the shut-up peace sign again and we all got quiet.
âWe canât thank you enough, Mrs. Mentry,â he said. âBut now we have a problem. What are we going to do with this money?â
Thatâs a problem? If you ask me, a problem is when you have no money at all.
âIâll spend it for you!â shouted our librarian, Mrs. Roopy. Everybody laughed.
âTell you what Iâm going to do,â Mr. Klutz said. âWeâre going to have a contest to decide what to do with the