Of Love & Regret by S. H. Kolee Read Free Book Online Page A

on each
other. Maybe that’s why Logan is never in a relationship longer than half a
second. Maybe that’s why my relationship with Adam is deteriorating.”
    “Are you sure it’s
not because you’re not being honest with yourself about your feelings for
Logan?” Emily asked. “I’ve seen the way you two interact. You’re the most couply
non-couple I’ve ever seen.”
    This was territory
I didn’t want to delve into too deeply, even though I had been the one to bring
it up. It would only make me more confused. Logan and I were just friends.
There would never be a possibility of anything more.
    “Let’s drop the
subject of Logan. It’s giving me a headache. I think I just need to chill out
and not overanalyze everything to death. We’re friends. We had an off night
last night. That’s all it was.” I wasn’t sure if I believed myself, but saying
it out loud made me feel better.
    “If you say so,”
Emily said disbelievingly, but she didn’t push the subject. Unfortunately, the
next topic she brought up made me feel even more uncomfortable. “Cassie’s
birthday is next weekend, isn’t it?”
    I nodded stiffly.
I had met Emily long after Cassie’s death, but she knew how much it had
impacted me even though I had never shared the details of it with her. She also
knew that I went back to Laurenston for her birthday every year, although I had
never revealed how sick Mrs. Brooks was. I preferred to keep that part of my
life separate from my present reality.
    “Do you need
someone to go with you?” she asked. “I’d be more than happy to.”
    I felt a rush of
warmth at her considerate offer, but I shook my head. I didn’t want the two
worlds to mix. “I appreciate the offer, but that’s okay. It gets easier every
year. I won’t be there long anyways.”
    I didn’t want to
mention that Logan was coming with me, so I changed the subject to the latest guy
Emily was dating. Our food arrived, and I was able to push my problems to the
back of my mind as I enthusiastically ate my Eggs Benedict and listened to
Emily regale me with tales about her latest dating conquests.
    The rest of brunch
was enjoyable, and I was feeling much better when we parted ways. Emily was an
assistant to a prominent interior designer, and the rest of her day was
dedicated to finding a certain fabric a client was demanding.
    With a full
stomach and only a slight headache, I decided to try to get a head start on my
column for next week when I got home. An hour had passed as I stared at the
blank page on the screen of my computer when I finally admitted to myself that
I was waiting for Logan to call. The fact that he hadn’t was distracting me,
and it bothered me more than I wanted to admit.
    I picked up my
phone, but I hesitated, my finger hovering over the button to dial his number.
I didn’t know what I would say to him. I had already realized that we were too
dependent on each other, so I should be giving him space instead of reaching
out to him. I put the phone down, but I couldn’t deny the disappointment I felt
in not being able to talk to him. Even though I had seen him just yesterday, I
missed him, and I was anxious about the way things had ended last night.
    I jumped when my
phone beeped, indicating an incoming text message. Seeing the name Logan
Delaney appear across the screen of my phone made me happier than it should
have, and I eagerly opened up his text message.
     
    What are you doing?
     
    It wasn’t much,
but it was better than nothing. I quickly typed out my reply.
     
    Trying to get a head start on my column for
next week, but I think I’m brain dead. What are you doing?
     
    I was tense as I
waited for Logan’s reply, unused to this uncertain feeling when it came to him.
     
    Watching Rear Window. I’m sorry about last
night. I think we both regret the things we said. Let’s just chalk it up to us
being overly sensitive.
     
    I breathed a sigh
of relief. Logan seemed to be willing to sweep this under the