gobbled and gulped until the book was completely gone. âNum-num-num-num-num-num-num!â
âOh no!â cried Olive. âWhat have you done?!â
The dinosaur screwed up her nose, coughed and spluttered. âGhak! Ghak! Pfft!â
A small damp shred of paper shot from her mouth and landed on Oliveâs knee, its bold red uppercase letters glaring and sinister: BEWARE!
âGood grief,â said Olive.
âNum-num-num-num-num-num-num!â The dinosaur dropped onto the floor and gobbled Oliveâs sock right down to where it disappeared into her shoe.
âBeware . . .â muttered Basil. âOnce the Time Slurp slips into reverse . . . what ?â He stood up, snapped his braces, shook his head and wandered out of the hall, trying to recall something that he had once read . . .
Something important . . .
Or maybe not . . .
If only he could remember . . .
9
In which we see that the study of plants is every bit as entertaining as the study of bottoms
âNum-num-num-num-num-num-num!â
Olive entered the science laboratory an hour later, with the dinosaur gnawing on her elbow. Pigg McKenzie was seated at the front of the room. A large notebook, a ruler, five pens and a pencil sat on the table in front of him. His front trotters were folded primly in his lap. Basil sat to his right, but the rest of the chairs at his table were empty. The pigâs goody two-shoes act fooled no-one . . . except poor, silly Mrs Groves . . . and Basil, of course, who was too new to realise that one should Avoid the Pig at All Costs.
Pigg McKenzie smirked at Olive and patted the chair to his left.
âUrgh,â she moaned and walked to the back of the room, as far from the pig as possible. She sat beside Frank, plonked the dinosaur on the table and yanked her elbow free.
The prehistoric babe howled, dived past Olive and wrapped her jaws around Frankâs arm. âNum-num-num-num-num-num-num!â
âOh, Olive!â cried Mrs Groves, smiling and fluttering her eyelashes. âYou seem to have a new pupil with you. Three newcomers in one day, how terribly exciting. A time traveller, a pig of great charm and a . . . a . . . a talking animal, I presume?â
âNum-num-num-num-num-num-num!â
Frankâs eyes watered with pain.
âNum-Num!â cooed Mrs Groves. âWhat a charming name! Unusual but charming.â
âNum-num-num-num-num-num-num!â
âWelcome to Groves,â sang the headmistress. âI hope you will be very happy here, Num-Num.â
Olive shrugged. It was as good a name as any!
Frank pulled his arm free and frowned.
âSheâs a baby dinosaur,â Olive explained to him. âItâs a long story . . . unbelievable but true.â
âI prefer stories that are believable but untrue ,â said Frank, who was a compulsive liar. His eyes twinkled andhe added, âYou do know that baby dinosaurs double in size every twenty-four hours for the first three weeks of life?â
Olive cast a nervous glance at Num-Num, who had just eaten an entire pencil case and its contents â thirty-six coloured pencils, eight jumbo crayons and a strawberry-scented eraser. The end of the zipper dangled stupidly out the side of her mouth. Was Frank lying . . . or did Num-Num already look bigger than when she first hatched?
âToday,â announced Mrs Groves, âwe are going to investigate a branch of science called botany.â
âHee, hee! Bottomy!â giggled Blimp. âMrs Groves said a rude word!â
âNot bottomy! Botany! â groaned Wordsworth. âThe study of plants.â
âOh,â sighed Blimp, his whiskers drooping with disappointment.
Todayâs lesson was botany , and while it was not quite as entertaining as discussing bottoms, Mrs Groves had filled the science laboratory with a spectacular range of plants in order to make the lesson as exciting as possible. There were moist mosses
Learning to Kill: Stories