On Lavender Lane by Joann Ross Read Free Book Online

language, the idea, which certainly seemed generous to Madeline, apparently didn’t impress.
    “How’s that going to help? Since the pan’s obviously inferior to begin with.”
    “Fine.” Now Madeline was losing patience. She dug into her purse and pulled out her billfold. “How much did you pay for the pan?”
    “I don’t have any idea. I bought them as a set. They’re
your
pans. You should know they’re only sold on the Shopping Channel as a set.”
    “Fine.” Her dentist was going to love her. From the way she was grinding her teeth, he was probably going to make a fortune selling her a set of crowns. “What did you pay for the set?”
    Her detractor paused just long enough to clue Madeline in to the fact that she was trying to decide how much she could get away with.
    Surprise, surprise. She ended up naming an amount Madeline knew to be nearly double the actual price.
    Wondering if she could write this off on her taxes as a promotional expense, or maybe goodwill, she began writing the check. “I’ll need your name. Unless you want it made out to cash.”
    “Denise Walker.” The woman snatched the piece of paper the second Madeline had finished writing. “How do I know this won’t bounce?”
    Bitch.
“It won’t. But I tape before a studio audience, so if it doesn’t clear, you can show up and tell the world.”
    “Someone should tell the world that your pots are junk.” The woman stuck the check in her bag. Then turned on a red suede heel and marched off.
    “You’re welcome,” Madeline murmured.
    “I would’ve decked her,” a woman standing behind Madeline said. “But you handled it with amazing class.”
    “Thanks. I haven’t had the best day. I really wouldn’t want to cap it off by getting arrested for assault.”
    “Yeah. I heard about your day.”
    Of course you have.
    “If my husband did that to me, they’d have to hide all the cleavers once I got home.”
    Madeline decided against mentioning she’d already considered that idea.
    “But if it’s any consolation, you’re a lot better-looking than the woman in the video.”
    “Thanks.” Not that it was any consolation.
    “And a better cook than your weasel of a spouse. I’ve tried some of your recipes and they’re great. But my husband took me to Maxime’s in Miami for our twenty-fifth wedding anniversary, and I have to tell you, for such a big ticket dinner, we were not impressed.
    “My eggplant-stuffed roasted salmon was surprisingly bland. Plus, my husband’s scallops committed the cardinal culinary sin of being overcooked.”
    “I’m sorry.” A word Madeline seemed to be saying a lot lately. Two more couples and she’d be in her taxi and, thank you, God, could escape.
    “Well, it wasn’t a total loss. I will say he’s created the sexiest restaurant we’ve ever been to. Between the waterfall, the ocean view, and the cool South Beach vibe, not to mention the blindfolded Chocolate Seduction, we couldn’t wait to get up to our room.”
    The Chocolate Seduction—which involved one dinerbeing blindfolded, then fed a sampling of exotic chocolates to guess the fillings—had been Maxime’s idea.
    Madeline had always suspected it was a dessert diners would order from room service, or take up to their rooms after dinner for fun and games later, but a surprising number of customers appeared to enjoy the exhibitionism of sampling while surrounded by strangers.
    She was wondering if Maxime had re-created the Chocolate Seduction game with the woman in the video when the woman in the taxi line suddenly turned as scarlet as a boiled lobster.
    “I’m sorry,” she said. “I don’t know what had me bringing up the sex thing. I mean…considering that he…You know.”
    Unfortunately, Madeline did know.
    “Don’t worry about it.”
Finally!
She was being assigned the taxi that had pulled up to the curb. “It’s good to hear that the dessert made up for a less-than-perfect meal.”
    “Oh, believe me,” the woman