Pineapple Lies by Amy Vansant Read Free Book Online

something more meaningful . She wanted to feel passionate about her work. At twenty-six, she felt too old to live so aimlessly.
    She’d hopped from teenager to retiree in the blink of an eye.
     
    Charlotte stepped into the pool and waded to the center. Jackie Blankenship, the water aerobics leader, set down her boom box and popped in the instruction tape. The tape was superfluous; all the ladies, and a smattering of men, had the routine memorized. Jackie once tried to introduce a new tape, but the ensuing mutiny ended her dreams of novelty. She grumbled bitterly about it. It was no secret she regretted offering to run the program, and the fact that no one would let her break the monotony of the routine added insult to injury.
    “I was hoping it would rain,” said Jackie to Charlotte as she walked by. “I don’t know why I ever offered to run this stupid club.”
    “I know, Jackie,” said Charlotte. “I know.”
    “The water is warmer again,” said Mariska. “They turned off the heat last week and people nearly lost their minds. It dropped to 79.”
    “It might be more refreshing it if wasn’t body temperature,” said Charlotte.
    “Oh, don’t you even try and suggest that,” said Darla. “Blasphemy.”
    Penny half-walked and half-swam to the group, her dark bob wet and slicked back across her scalp.
    “I’d love for you to be a guest speaker at the new committee,” Penny said to Charlotte as she arrived, her leathery skin crinkling as her mouth formed something like a smile. Charlotte wasn’t sure if Penny was being friendly or had just successfully lured children into her gingerbread house.
    “I saw the flyer. I’m guessing you’ll have less to talk about if I don’t show up.”
    Penny thrust out her chin with a level eight sniff (How Dare You!) “Is that a threat?”
    “What? No! It’s an observation. I’ll come. I can’t imagine the rumors if I don’t.”
    “Yes, you have to come. This is very serious. We need to find out who this person is and what happened to them!”
    “I think I know who she is, but I would like to know what happened to her.”
    “You know who she is? It’s a she ?”
    “It’s that pawnshop fellow’s mother,” said Susan Hecht from the back of the pool. Half the ladies claimed to be deaf, but they always heard juicy gossip from several miles away.
    “I thought it was his girlfriend,” said another woman, new to the neighborhood. Charlotte had forgotten her name, but she knew she lived alone. She’d heard the woman kept twenty-five bowls of dog food scattered around her house, so if she dropped dead, her Pug wouldn’t starve to death.
    “He killed her for cheating,” the woman added.
    “I thought he was gay?” said Katherine O’Malley, tilting her head so the decorative flaps on her swimming cap flopped to one side like dominoes.
    Charlotte rolled her eyes. “It might be Declan’s mother , not his girlfriend.”
    “But he is gay, right?”
    “ No. I mean, I don’t know. What does that matter? Either way, he didn’t kill anyone.”
    “How do you know?” asked Susan.
    “He’s barely older than the bones. I doubt he killed his mother when he was eleven and buried her in my backyard.”
    “Declan is a funny name,” said the new lady. “Maybe he killed her as a boy, like in that movie…”
    “Oh! What was the name of that movie?” asked Penny. “I know what you mean. The little boy killed everyone.”
    “The Omen,” said Charlotte, mentally thanking the neighborhood for her vast knowledge of old movies. “And no. Don’t be ridiculous. Declan isn’t Damien.”
    “Ah right! Damien!” said Penny. “That’s like Declan…”
    “If he isn’t gay, let me know?” asked Katherine. “My granddaughter is coming next week. I could set them up.”
    Katherine’s granddaughter was an ex-beauty pageant winner. Charlotte felt an odd pang of anxiety and dread.
    What was that?
    She swallowed and vowed to drink less coffee in the