Project 17 by Laurie Faria Stolarz Read Free Book Online

I'm not exactly GQ material with my ghost-white face and freckly nose, and now the shiner I've got to top the picture off. But who knows, maybe one of these girls will have a soft spot (or two) for tall, banged-up, and funny.
    Slicking my hair back as best I can with one hand, I
    56
    stretch my brain cap over the crown of my head with the other. It's one of those second-skin bathing caps. It's got a picture of a brain on the top, making me look like a bald man with a lobotomy. I wore it last year to a Halloween party and pulled it out for tonight (among other party pleasers) since, for obvious reasons, it suits the occasion well.
    A few minutes later, I spot a car pulling into the lot. It's Derik's--a dark blue Chevy truck. He backs in a couple cars down from mine, but he doesn't get out--just kind of sits there with his headlights shut off, engine halted, like he doesn't even know I'm here.
    I grab my backpack and scoot out quick, hoping he doesn't spot me. I can see the shadow of him sitting there. Mimi's in there, too, sitting in the passenger side. The lights in the parking lot are anything but bright, but I'm still able to make out her kinky black hair.
    I walk as slowly and quietly as I can toward the driver's side. Then I smack my palms against the window and let out a sickly moan--the victim of a lobotomy. I even lower my head so they can see the brains.
    "What the hell are you doing, man?" Derik shouts, rolling down the window.
    "What?" I ask, the smile melting off my face. I look at Mimi to see if maybe she has a sense of humor, but she looks just as peeved.
    "Are you trying to get us bagged before we even get up there?" Derik asks. "Get that thing off your head. You're supposed to be wearing black."
    57
    "I am wearing black," I argue, pulling a black knitted hat on over my brain cap.
    Derik sighs and leans back in his seat, clearly stressed. He checks his watch. "Nine twenty," he whispers. "Where the hell is everybody?"
    "Getting fitted for strait jackets," I joke.
    But Derik doesn't appreciate my humor. "How 'bout I pop you in your other eye?" he says.
    A few moments later, another car pulls into the lot. "This is probably them," Mimi says, pulling on a black ski mask. At first I think the mask is a joke--that she's on the same wavelength as me--but she doesn't even crack a smile.
    Tony and Greta get out of their car, dudded out in black as well. Greta's got on a long black skirt with a black fur jacket that reminds me of Shithead, my cat.
    "Are you gonna be able to climb in that outfit?" Derik asks her, stepping out of his truck.
    "You said dark clothing," she says, in the deepest, huskiest voice I've ever heard come out of a girl. "And for your information, this skirt is Calvin Klein. As a filmmaker, you should be grateful that I took so much time with my wardrobe."
    "I'll be grateful if you can get your ass up that hill," Derik says.
    "You look amazing," Tony tells her, giving her butt a good rap.
    "Are you sure? I mean, maybe the fur is overkill. No
    58
    pun intended. I don't want those PETA people talking trash about me in some tabloid."
    "Amazing," Tony chirps, a high-pitched voice like someone kicked him in the jewels. "Like a real A-lister."
    Whatever that means, it totally perks Greta up. The girl snuggles up to his Slim Jim figure and purrs into his neck.
    "Get a room," Mimi says.
    "Preferably one with some shock equipment," I say. "Could add a real zap to the experience."
    "Where's Liza?" Derik asks, ignoring my joke.
    "She's with us," Greta says, pausing between purrs.
    I look toward their car and notice a shadow moving in the backseat.
    "Let's just say she's a tad bit nervous," Tony says.
    "More like a basket case," Greta corrects. "This obviously wasn't a good idea for her."
    Derik unzips his DV recorder from its case and turns it on.
    "What are you doing?" I ask.
    Instead of answering, he brings the recorder over to Tony's car. He knocks on the window, and Liza lets him in.
    "That's really smart,"