Raised By Wolves 1 - Brethren by Raised by Wolves 01 Read Free Book Online Page A

explorations with sex and love, and Shane, had occurred in a barn much like this one, only one in better repair. I was overcome with the smell of hay and horses, and the memory of giggles and furtive touches that quickly turned to passionate murmurs and caresses. That had been the first step on the road to ruin. In the end it had not gone well, not well at all.
    Yet the beginning had not been unpleasant; it had been wonderful, in fact. I marveled at the workings of my mind. Why had it latched onto that first time in the straw and decided to braid it in with all the horror that came later? Was it because of Goliath’s death? Was it because the stable had often been our private trysting place? Surely that first time had not been evil in and of itself. That time, and the year that followed, had been filled with love and promise. Before Shane decided what we did was wrong. Before he decided I should be punished for leading him astray. Before he decided that it was less morally repugnant to take by force what I offered freely than to accept it in the spirit it was given.
    And now I was returning. Could I kill him this time? Would I?
    I did not sleep again. I held still and cursed a demon of my own making.
    We woke at dawn, or at least rose to move about with the sun, as I had not truly slept. The boys were quick to douse the flames so as to avoid alerting anyone to their presence. We ate the rest of the bread and cheese. Knowing I could buy more, I left them with my spare clothing.
    Knowing it would probably result in someone’s death, probably his, I left Big John with a pistol, shot, and powder. He stammered and regarded me with awe as we went a good way from their shelter, and I taught him how to load and shoot the piece. Then I gave him some of the silver coin I had. It was a good amount; used sparingly, it could keep them fed through the winter. It was the best I could do.
    I was touched by reverent hands as I mounted the mare. I wished them well and rode on. For a while I felt I was deserving of praise, and my heart was light. Then the truth of the whole matter and the probable outcome of their short lives engulfed me once again. With that, and the omnipresent knowledge that Shane lay at the end of my journey, I was in a fine fit of melancholy by the time I reached Dunfield late in the day.
    My uncle had a modest estate and a fine comfortable house with a lovely garden. He was not a man given to ostentation or airs. Being my father’s younger brother, and with my being my father’s eldest son and presumed heir, my uncle would never inherit a title. He always seemed relieved by this, as it left him free to travel and hunt at his whim. He had married once, but she had died in childbirth; and since he had been very much in love with her, he had never bothered to make the attempt again.
    As luck would have it, my uncle was not at home. However, his housekeeper recognized my name, became flustered, and seemed on the verge of a fit of vapors at the sight of me. My uncle’s manservant had to help her to a chair. As I stood in the foyer and watched her pant, I wondered what had been said of me in my absence. Then I realized I knew her. She had been in my uncle’s employ before I left England.
    When the woman recovered, she seemed happy to bid me enter; and they showed me a guest room posthaste, so that I could rest from my travels. My uncle would not return for several days; but they assured me he would be very happy to find me there upon his arrival, and most vexed if they did not offer me every hospitality. I ate from a plate and bathed for the first time since Florence. I thanked them for all their work, and then asked them to leave me be for as long as I might sleep.
    Finally in a comfortable place of safety after nearly three months of hardship, I slept through the night and most of the next day. And then only hunger and the need to relieve myself pulled me from the deep feather bed.
    I ate in the kitchen, and happily