Raucous by Ben Paul Dunn Read Free Book Online

believe you are.”
    Mitch opened up his arms. “I’m just an over-aged teenager getting bored with nothing to do.  They should open up a youth club, keep us off the streets.”
    “I believe they closed that specific institution down, let the loons out.”
    Mitch pushed his tongue inside his right cheek.
    “Are you too old to be politically correct?”  He asked.
    “Too experienced to believe what you say.”
    Parker pushed the photo across the table again.
    Mitch pushed it back.
    “I’ve already seen it.  It’s a photo of the man who voluntarily got into the van.  He told me his name was Jim.  You confirmed that was true, and told me his surname is Sharples, which means you know more about him than me.”
    “I know a lot more.  More about you.”
    “More than me?”
    “Well, what do you know?”
    “That his name was Jim, and he wanted to get in the van and speak to his friends.”
    “Did you recognize the other two?”
    “One probable plumber, although his hands didn’t look nearly swollen or gnarled enough for him to be doing too much work, and an educated one, who probably isn’t educated at all but would just like to be that way because he is an empty shell of confusion.”
    “Did you see into the van?”
    “Yes, there were seats and a steering wheel.  I believe they were tuned into BBC radio 2. Although I can’t be sure, but I think I heard the dulcet tones of a DJ that used to be hip and cool twenty years back and is now flogging the same old tired banter crap for the middle-aged generation in search of their fun youthful days.”
    “You’re very observant.”
    “I just hate DJs.”
    Parker paused.  He half-closed his left eye.  He smiled and shook his head. “And that’s all you can remember?  No, idea who those two men were,” he asked.
    “The chuckle brothers?”
    “No idea who they are.”
    “Not a kid’s TV watcher.”
    “No I am not.”
    “You should try.  Some really good stuff there.”
    Parker paused again.  He placed his hands on the edge of the table in front of him and pushed.  “We haven’t really hit it off, have we?”  He asked.
    “My mum always told me, never trust an alcoholic.  Or is your nose like that because someone punched it.  Repeatedly.”
    “And what was your mum’s name?”
    “It depended on the context, but generally she was called mum, what with being a mum.”
    “Everyone called her mum?” Parker asked.
    “Are you casting doubts on the fidelity of my mother?  Are you saying I have secret brothers and sisters?”
    “You are not being overly cooperative.  Why is that?”
    “Because I’m bored. I would have an hour ago but now you’re annoying me.  And if you say, shall we go back to the start, I will, only my start I’ll take as being in bed when your friends knocked on my door.”
    “Are you annoyed I was delayed?” Parker asked.
    “You weren’t delayed.  The car-park is right the other side of that window.  Nothing has been in or out since I sat down.  Sure, you could have come in the front way, but the door has a buzzer to have it opened and that didn’t sound.  You were already in the building and you made me wait.  That’s rude.  So sow what you whatever and so on and so forth.”
    “I was working.”
    “You told me you had just arrived, so how am I supposed to believe what you say when you have already lied to me.  What are you, a big fan of the Catholic church?  Please, I know we are a corrupt, sickly wealthy organization of crime and punishment, but please ignore that and let me be your moral guardian for your stroll along the path to redemption and a place in the fantasy land in the sky.  Honesty begets honesty.  Dishonesty begets dishonesty. You lied, I don’t trust you.  And drunks speak too much.”
    “Your mother again?”
    “Don’t bring my mother into this, god bless her soul.”
    “Is she dead?”
    “You’re the detective.  Or are you?  We’re in a closed police station.  You