that?"
"Say you'll let us start over."
"Um, okay? I still don’t understand where all this is coming from.”
After sitting there for a moment in silence each, deciding we had said all we could at the time, we got out of the car an d headed into the house both of us surrounded by a cloud of our own sadness. It was for the better--probably, but this didn't feel right. It felt like I was losing yet another person I cared about.
When we got inside I found Ana sitting in the library, it was my favorite room in the entire house. She had a cup of coffee at the end table by the couch and was pretending to read. I say pretending because in all the time I had lived there, which granted hadn't been that long, I had never once seen her even glance at a single book on the shelf. She had most likely read them all before, several times, but this was all show. She was trying to act as though my running away hadn't affected her, seeming to forget our conversation at the hospital.
"Hello, Ana."
"Oh, hi Juliana."
She didn't look up, but continued to stare at her book.
“Good book?” I asked with feigned interest.
“Very.”
“Really? What’s it about?”
She didn’t say anything and I was starting to think she wasn’t going to answer me. Then she had the audacity to actually flip the book around so she could look at the cover and see what she was pretending to read.
She opened her mouth to start to give me an answer, and I cut her off, “Oh, don’t even bother. I know you weren’t even reading it in the first place; you were just waiting around to see if I was going to show up. Well, here I am and before you start to lecture me, yell at me, throw me into the wall, and flash your fangs at me, let me start by saying I’m sorry, okay. It was wrong of me to leave. You and William both risked a lot, no, you risked everything, to help me rescue Christian, and I am forever indebted to you both for that. You both said you would explain all the secrets to me after that was done. And instead of giving you the benefit of the doubt, when you have never given me a reason not to trust you, I called you both horrible names and fled from you. I truly am sorry; can you find it within your heart to forgive me?”
Ana just stared at me her turquoise eyes wide with shock. I could feel the surprise coming from her through our bond. I guess she was expecting another fight from me, and I couldn’t really blame her. Not after the way I had been behaving lately.
“Yeah. Of course, I’ll forgive you. I’m glad you came home. You are staying . . . right?”
“If I can, that is if you and William still want me too.”
She looked questioningly from me, then to William leaning against the fireplace, and back to me again as if looking for answers to unspoken questions.
“Why wouldn’t William want you to stay here? What’s going on?”
“Nothing is going on. I just wanted to be sure I was still allowed to stay after what had happened, that’s all.”
I walked past her and into the kitchen to make a fresh pot of coffee. None of us could drink it, but we often made it during times of stress. The aroma was enough to be calming; it often reminded me of my days of being human. I would drink coffee by the pot back then. I hadn’t tried cooking any foods to see if it had the same effect. That seemed a little more wasteful.
Ana followed me into the kitchen and sat at the table while I finished with the coffee.
“Want a cup?” I asked her.
“No, I’m good. Is everything okay? You seem, I don’t know, depressed?”
I spared a quick glance toward the library then back to the cupboard to grab a coffee cup.
“No, I’m fine.”
“He’s on the phone. He won’t hear you.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Ok, well when you decide you do. You can talk to me, I will probably understand better than you realize. He did break my heart once too, remember.”
“It’s not that ...” I was starting to