'Scuse Me While I Kill This Guy by Leslie Langtry Read Free Book Online

pissed!
    “I didn’t know that when I met him! It’s just what he does. It’s not like he’s FBI or a cop.”
    Okay, I’d admit to that one time I’d had a date with a Fed by mistake. But it had never come back to haunt me, and there’d been no second date. (Relax. I didn’t kill him.)
    “At least she had a date!” Liv interjected.
    I threw my hands up in the air. “Now, that doesn’t make me sound pathetic at all!”
    Poppy padded into the room and looked at us. Apparently we’d woken her up. Finding nothing interesting, she waddled to her food dish and began eating.
    “See what you did? You woke the baby!” I yelled at Dak.
    Dak waved his hands in the air. “Okay, fine. I’m overreacting. I’m glad you’re seeing someone. Even if he is body armor.” Body armor was what we called bodyguards. They usually slowed the process of hitting our target with bullets.
    “I accept your apology,” I said rather magnanimously.
    “So.” Liv popped a Hostess mini-muffin in her mouth. (The girl never, ever gained weight.) “Are you going to see him again?”
    “Did you get laid?” Dak cut in.
    I threw my hands into the air. “Yes,” I said to Liv. Then I turned to Dak. “Not yet, not that it’s any of your business. Besides, he’s only here for six months, then it’s back to Europe with his client. I can’t imagine us having a long-distance thing after—goddamnit! It’s only been one date! Why am I telling you all this?”
    Liv looked to Dak. “She’s a little defensive, isn’t she?”
    “No shit,” he responded. “She needs to get laid.”
    “I’m right here!” I shouted. I hated being ignored. “And there’s nothing to discuss!”
    I scooped up the fat pug puppy, walked out the back door, and set Poppy down in the yard. I followed her while she used my lawn as her personal toilet, then brought her back in. Liv and Dak were waiting for me.
    “Okay, we’ll change the subject.” Dak smiled. “What’s the job?”
    I blinked at him. “What are you talking about?”
    “The job! Who’s Vic?”
    “What?” I had no clue.
    Dak stared at me. “The envelope I gave you yesterday! Who’s Vic?”
    “Oh.” I’d forgotten about that. Vic was the name we gave our victims, kind of like a secret code. Not the most difficult code to crack, but we’re kind of lazy. “I didn’t open it.” I had forgotten about the hit. I’d been too wrapped up in Diego’s eyes—I mean, Romi’s (and Poppy’s) training.
    “I’ll open it later.” We had a couple of weeks. And I needed to focus on other things first.
    “You have to do it before the reunion,” Dak pressed.
    “I know.” I scratched between Poppy’s ears. “I’ll get to it. When have you ever known me to screw up a job?”
    “Never,” Dak mused, “but there’s a first time for everything.”
    “Out.” I pointed to the door.
    Liv fondled the pug’s ears, then smiled as she grabbed Dak by the arm and pulled him out of my house.
    “Now, you, I like,” I said in a baby voice to Poppy. She wiggled in my arms. “You don’t ask any questions.” I set her on the floor and walked into the living room. The pup trailed me, trying clumsily to climb onto the couch next to me. I lifted her up, and she snuggled onto my lap, promptly falling asleep.
    The envelope sat on the end table, unopened. I supposed I shouldn’t leave it there, but I was getting careless these days. I picked it up and turned it around in my hands, giving myself one nasty paper cut.
    “That’s enough for you,” I said as I set it down and sucked on my finger. There was a lot to think about. A hit that had to be taken care of, the family reunion, training Romi, housetraining Poppy, and an impending second date with the delectable Diego.
    I thought about the kiss he had given me last night. It had been perfect in every way. I wanted more. When would he call? Oh yes, he had said today sometime.
    Now, assassins don’t usually sit by the phone waiting for Australian