forced to beg
another man for anything again, Lord Edgeworth.”
His gaze narrowed. “Call me Nick,
please.”
She clenched her teeth, but after a
moment forced herself to relax enough to speak. “ Nick , I will never beg
you to bed me. Ever .”
His face turned savage. “I should’ve
killed Lord Derwent. What did that bastard do to you?”
She circled her arms around her waist,
wishing she could hide. She hated feeling exposed. “I’ll never recount that
time with you simply so you can examine what I already know. The
particulars of what Lord Derwent did to me no longer matter. All I can tell you
is he killed a part of me. You can marry me as I am or you are free to go. I’ll
survive somehow. I always do.” She squelched the bitter laugh that wanted to
escape. She was strong enough to carry on but not to forget and move on from
the bad memories.
His gaze softened. “I’ll marry you as
you are. And I’m going to teach you the difference in begging to be
bedded because of fear and begging to be bedded out of longing.” The
determination in his eyes frightened her. What if he succeeded? Letting down
her defenses was something she’d vowed to never do. She notched up her chin.
“You can try and teach me whatever you like as long as our bargain remains
intact. We live separately and you give me the theatre and my money before we are married. Oh, and you promise to use preventive measures when we’re together.”
He smiled a slow smile that made her
heart skip a beat. “I’ve already had the marriage contract drawn up. The
special license from the Archbishop of Canterbury should be delivered to my
house tomorrow. Rest assured I’ll take care of all your other requirements.”
Relief made her dizzy. Gripping the side
of the desk, she spoke. “Wonderful. Then all you need to tell me is when and
where to show up and I’ll see you there.”
A mischievous look glittered in his
eyes. “There are a few more things I’d like discuss before I go.”
“Such as?”
“Tell me, what sort of wedding did you
dream of as a child?”
His question stunned her. He really had
been listening at the door earlier. His concern for her sensibilities touched
her. “I really couldn’t say.” She looked down because that wasn’t entirely
true.
“Come now.” He spoke softly. “I know you
had some wishes for your wedding day. I’m begging you to share them with me,
and I vow I’ve never pleaded with a woman for anything. You’re the first.”
She glanced up and blinked at his
earnest gaze. Something inside of her softened, and she sighed. “When I was
young, and still a silly girl, I fantasized I would one day have a wedding
where I would actually have a new dress to wear, and a family member who loved
me standing as my witness and I would dance.”
“Dance? At your wedding breakfast?” He
quirked his eyebrows up.
Her face grew hot with embarrassment.
“As I said, it was a silly girl’s ridiculous longings. I never owned anything
new. I never had any family that loved me. And I’ve never been asked to dance.”
She shrugged. “I’m older and much wiser now. Tell me where to go to marry you,
and I will.”
He grinned and proffered his elbow to
her.
“Are you leaving?” She gripped his arm
and fell into step beside him.
“I’m taking you to get a new dress.”
“What?” Shock stilled her step. “No, no.
You mustn’t do that. We have a bargain.”
His mouth twitched into a smile. “I’m
not breaking our bargain. We will enter into a marriage of convenience in two
days. Nothing more, rest assured.”
“Oh.” For some inane reason his words
hurt her feelings. “Then why do you want to take me to buy a dress?”
He looked thoughtful for a moment. “Just
because we aren’t in love doesn’t mean I don’t want my future wife to look
nice. I have appearances to keep, you know.”
What he said made perfect sense, but he
had a mischievous look in his eyes. Yet, if he was telling the truth,