Secretly More by Lux Zakari Read Free Book Online

doing, living her life and never feeling anything close to that remarkable? Could she actually call it living her life at all?
    Ferney turned to her sister, a look of genuine concern in her eyes. “You really never felt anything like that with Dane?”
    “Of course I have.” Kimber cleared her throat, trying to shake the latest bit of anxiety rising inside her. “Now please—can we stop talking about this?”
    “Fine.” Ferney selected a big, black dildo, complete with a mushroom tip and veins that looked like a highway map. Kimber guesstimated they were about the size of an interstate at that. Ferney held it toward her sister, the dildo wobbling back and forth. “What about this?”
    “If my vagina was the size of a moon crater, maybe. Put the harpoon back.”
    “This dinky thing? Psh. If you think this is big, you should see Paul’s.”
    “Let’s get talking about those boundaries again.” Kimber tried to smile, but her insides twisted. Her relationship with Dane seemed more pointless and frustrating than ever. She was twenty-six years old, fresh from a six-year dating disaster, and horrified to learn that she may have never had an orgasm before. All of a sudden, the clock was ticking. There was a lot of lost time to make up for. Aside from the vibrator, where else would she start?

    * * *
     

    That night, Kimber tossed and turned, listening to the neighbors bounce between a crime scene investigation show and “The Nanny.” The sound kept her awake and dwelling on the fact that twenty-four hours had passed without hearing from Jay. They’d always carved out time to contact each other at least once a day, even if it was just a text message, but it didn’t look like he was going to be resuming that tradition any time soon. Aside from here and there at the casino, maybe she’d never see him again. After all, if she were him, she wouldn’t exactly be excited to hang out after what had happened. The memory turned her stomach. It was just as bad as what happened with Dane, and she felt totally alone.
    In an effort to improve her mood, Kimber reached for the vibrator her sister bought her earlier: a glitter-flecked My First Vibe in vibrant magenta with multiple speeds. It was five inches long and two inches around, and she eyed it with trepidation. She was on the brink of foreign territory. The thought made her give a bitter laugh. How could she have gone so long without total satisfaction? Earth-shattering orgasms shouldn’t be unfamiliar at her age, and the promise of impending pleasure made her kick off her pajama pants, leaving her nude from the waist down.
    Kimber gave the vibrator’s base a twist and the phallic object buzzed to life. She settled back against her pillow, steepled her knees, and parted her legs. Then she touched the tip of the vibrator to her clit and immediately shuddered at the sensation. This was already amazing. Maybe Ferney really was onto something.
    She closed her eyes and traced her clit and her opening with the vibrator, letting the pleasure ripple through her. She couldn’t help but whimper, and the sound of her own desire turned her on even more. The vibrator teased her entrance and her hips twitched, but she didn’t slide it inside herself. She wanted to savor this.
    Her desire dimmed as her thoughts drifted to Dane. How was this toy already closer to bringing her off than he had ever come? Was that a fair assessment of his skills, considering she was already so jaded toward him? She shook her head. No, she refused to spend her time with My First Vibe thinking of her ex-boyfriend.
    Kimber pressed the vibrator to her clit again as the memory of Jay’s lips on hers sprang unbidden to her mind. She hadn’t granted herself permission to even think of it since it happened, but suddenly she couldn’t think of anything else. In a flash of honesty, she had to admit that although it had been short and sweet, it was easily the best kiss she’d ever had, one she was ashamed to