he’d been patient with her, helping her work through
equations, and taking her suggestions for improvements on board.
There was also, Louise had to admit, the fact that up until then
offers had been pretty thin on the ground for her.
She’d always been a bookish person, nerdy
even. College friends and colleagues hadn’t seemed to see her in
that light. She’d thought at the least spending time with William
might help assuage her loneliness. Money was tight, she only got to
see her parents every few months, and her younger sister was a six
hour drive away.
Then before Louise knew what was happening
one date became two, then three, and then they were several months
into a relationship. When William proposed it had seemed so easy to
say yes, made perfect sense.
She’d never questioned that decision.
Until now.
Until Jude.
But then there was a lot of
things in her relationship she hadn’t questioned Louise realized,
and that thought startled her, made her heart give a weird sort of
stutter. She shook her head slightly, almost as if she was trying
to deny them, but for the first time in all the months she’d spent
with William, those hidden thoughts would not be denied.
Like why they were marrying so soon, it had
only been a year after all. Why William hadn’t wanted to give
living together a try before they made the big leap. Why he wanted
to wait for them to make love….
She lowered her head, not wanting Jude to
see the turmoil that she knew must be obvious in her eyes. She’d
never really thought it through before now, preferring instead to
look forward to the day they were married, but Jude…Louise inhaled
sharply…he wanted to bed her so much that he was chasing her even
though she was as good as promised to someone else.
Why wasn’t William chasing her like
that?
Because he already has you,
her mind supplied, and yet even as she thought that Louise couldn’t
help but wonder why William was happy to wait. He was a man after
all. He must desire or else why would he have proposed? And more to
the point why had she agreed? Why had she been so happy to
agree?
Because he doesn’t make you feel like Jude
does. Because you didn’t realize anyone could make you feel this
way. You wouldn’t have been happy to wait then, would you?
“What are you thinking about?”
“Nothing,” Louise whispered, her head
spinning as the truth of the situation hit. It was all Jude’s
fault! If she hadn’t met him she wouldn’t be feeling this way.
Wouldn’t be questioning the situation, which until now, had seemed
perfectly fine.
Maybe not desperately exciting.
Maybe not something to make her head
spin.
But nice, comfortable,
hardwearing. It had seemed like enough. It
doesn’t anymore.
“Him?” Jude growled. “I bet he loves your
pencil skirts as much as I do. Fuck, no wonder.” He scowled. “If
you were belonged to me, Louise, the only office you’d be working
is mine, exactly where I could see you.”
“I’m not yours,” she said weakly.
“Not yet. Eat your sorbet, it’s starting to
melt.”
“Are you trying to fatten me up?” she asked.
“Every time I open my mouth you’re trying to get me to eat
something.”
He sighed. “Oh, Louise, please do not say
things like that.”
“I don’t understand—”
“Right now there is only one thing I can
think about you eating. I’ve thought about it many, many times
these past three days.”
“I—”
“And I tell you to eat because your
marvelous brain needs the calories, not to mention that perfect
body of yours.”
Louise flushed, her belly contracting at his
words, and though she knew it sounded like fishing, she couldn’t
help the words that left her lips. “My body is hardly perfect.”
“It is exactly perfect,” he stated. “There
is nothing about it I would change.”
William suggested you
diet. William has never called you perfect. Never asked you to get
down on your knees and… Louise screamed at
her brain to shut
Scott McEwen, Thomas Koloniar