Sex Made Easy by Debby Herbenick Read Free Book Online Page B

Female ejaculation is not the same as urine (pee), and the chances of that are very, very low. Researchers who have conducted chemical analyses of female ejaculate have found that it is distinct from urine, and that it is composed of creatinine, prostate specific antigen, glucose, fructose, and other substances. 16 - 17
    That said, if you accidentally release urine when you laugh, cough, or sneeze, or if you have to pee so often throughout the day or night that it bothers you, let your health care provider know. In one study my research team conducted at Indiana University, we found that women’s incontinence symptoms were among the biggest predictors of less pleasurable sex. If you can get your urinary concerns addressed and, if needed, treated, you may feel more confident in bed.
    But back to female ejaculation: as far as scientists can tell, there is nothing unhealthy about this experience. It happens to millions of women.Although it surprises some women and their partners at first, many grow to enjoy it as part of their sexual experience. I like to think of female ejaculation as a “beauty’s in the eye of the beholder” kind of thing; some people aren’t thrilled with female ejaculation, while others are. A friend of mine who often experiences female ejaculation looks to it as a sign of great sex. And a man I know who’s come across it a few times says it’s always a surprise when he encounters it, but he loves pleasing women so much that it’s never a bad surprise. It just is what it is.
    A few words about prep work: as with men’s “wet spots,” some women lay a towel down on the bed, or other sex surface, before they have sex to minimize the post-sex cleanup. Others just let it flow. It’s totally up to you and your partner.
9. What to do if . . . your labia get pushed in during sex
    Easy: pause for a moment during sex and pull them out. If one or both labia are pushed in in such a way that you need your male partner to pull out so you can remove them (rare, but possible), ask him to gently pull out for a moment. And before you go blaming your labia size for your discomfort, let me reassure you that labia of any shape or size can get pushed inside uncomfortably during sex. Labiaplasty (surgery to resize and reshape the labia) is definitely not a guarantee against this experience, as even women with itsy bitsy inner labia (less than one or two centimeters long) have this happen to them at times. Trust me on this one.
10. What to do if . . . your vagina tears during sex
    I think of tearing during sex as falling into one of three categories. Each type is important and requires a different strategy.
    The first kind of tearing is quite common and can be thought of as very tiny tears—invisible to the naked eye—that occur inside the vaginal canal or around the vaginal entrance. These tears are the result of friction between a woman’s vagina and the penetrating fingers, penis, or sex toy. They’re more likely to happen if a woman is not well lubricated during penetration (such as during sex in the shower, when her natural vaginal lubrication may have dried, making sex feel rough and uncomfortable).These kinds of tears also sometimes happen if her male partner’s penis is larger than average, or if sex is vigorous or rough or lasts a long time. If you experience this kind of vaginal tearing (and many of us have), you might not feel any pain or discomfort during sex. Later on, however, when you go to the bathroom, you might notice a small amount of light-colored blood on the toilet paper after you wipe yourself, or you might notice a trace of blood on your underwear. This has certainly happened to me before, and spending more time in foreplay or using a water-based lubricant has done the trick for me. This kind of vaginal tearing is usually not serious and often heals on its own within two to four days, particularly if you avoid sex or masturbation while it