eyes. Then she lowered her gaze to the first page of the letter, rice paper, black ink.
‘ My beloved lord ’
she said
‘ don’t be afraid, don’t move, be silent, no one will see us .’
59.
Stay like that, I want to look at you, I looked at you so much but you weren’t for me, now you are mine, don’t come near me, please, stay as you are, we have one night for us, and I want to look at you, I’ve never seen you like that, your body mine, your skin, close your eyes, and caress yourself, please
Said Madame Blanche, Hervé Joncour listened,
don’t open your eyes if you can, and caress yourself, your hands are beautiful, I’ve dreamed of them so many times now I want to see them, I like seeing them on your skin, like that, please go on, don’t open your eyes, I’m here, no one can see us and I am near you, caress yourself my beloved lord, caress your sex, please, gently ,
she stopped, ‘Continue, please’, he said,
your hand on your sex is beautiful, don’t stop, I like watching it and watching you, my beloved lord, don’t open your eyes, not yet, you mustn’t be afraid, I’m near you, do you hear me? I’m here, I can touch you, this is silk, do you feel it? It’s the silk of my robe, don’t open your eyes and you will have my skin ,
she said, she read softly, with the voice of a child- woman,
you will have my lips, when I touch you for the first time it will be with my lips, you won’t know where, at some point you will feel the warmth of my lips, on you, you can’t know where if you don’t open your eyes, don’t open them, somewhere you’ll feel my mouth, suddenly,
he listened without moving, from the pocket of his grey suit a bright white handkerchief stuck out,
maybe it will be your eyes, I will rest my mouth on your eyelids and eyebrows, you will feel the warmth go into your head, and my lips on your eyes, inside, or maybe it will be your sex, I’ll place my lips there, and, opening them, descend, little by little ,
she said, her head was bent over the pages, and one hand brushed her neck, slowly,
I will let your sex half close my mouth, entering between my lips, pressing my tongue, and my saliva will run along your skin to your hand, my kiss and your hand, one inside the other, on your sex ,
he listened, he kept his gaze fixed on an empty silver frame, hanging on the wall,
until finally I will kiss your heart, because I want you, I will bite the skin that beats over your heart, because I want you, and with your heart in my mouth you’ll be mine, truly, with my mouth in your heart you’ll be mine, forever, if you don’t believe me open your eyes my beloved lord and look at me, it’s me, who can ever cancel out this moment that’s happening, and this my body now without silk, your hands touching it, your eyes looking at it ,
she said, she was leaning towards the lamp, the light struck the pages and went through her transparent robe,
your fingers in my sex, your tongue on my lips, you who slide under me, hold my hips, pick me up, let me slide over your sex, slowly, who can destroy this, you inside me moving slowly, your hands on my face, your fingers in my mouth, the pleasure in your eyes, your voice, you move slowly but until you hurt me, my pleasure, my voice ,
he listened, at a certain point he turned to look at her, he saw her, he wanted to lower his eyes but couldn’t,
my body on yours, your back that raises me up, your arms that won’t let me go, the thrusting inside me, it’s a sweet violence, I see your eyes searching mine, they want to know how far to hurt me, as far as you want, my beloved, there is no end, it will not end, do you see? No one will be able to destroy this moment that is happening, forever you will throw your head back, crying, forever I will close my eyes wiping the tears from my brow, my voice in yours, your violence holding me tight, there is no longer time to flee or force to resist, it was to be this moment, and is this moment, believe me,