of friends. Theyâreââ She gestures at the crush all around us. âThey love this. Is it just me?â
I catch sight of Alex, stalking around the crowd, examining the goods like a kid in a candy store. âItâs not just you,â I say kindly.
âSeriously, are these the choices for a social life? Be a hermit or this ?â
âMy brother Tommy suggested a third way,â I put in sardonically. âI wonât bore you with the details.â
Strange as it may seem, I feel an oblique connection with Kendra. Sheâs as out of place at this party as I am in the Luca family. Take tonight. In a million years, you could never explain to Tommy that setting up a seventeen-year-old with a hooker isnât the worldâs most thoughtful present.
Thatâs part and parcel of the Mob. Lawyers go home at night and stop being lawyers. But the vending-machine business is twenty-four/seven. They even call it The Life. Dad and Tommy donât work at their jobs; they live them. No wonder they canât keep me out of it.
And it doesnât help that they donât even see what theyâre doing to me. Once, just once, Iâd like to hand it back to them in spades.
Yeah, right. I sigh and have another swig. Kendra stares at me with open distaste. My first thought is, Who cares what she thinks? But thereâs another part of meâthe part trained by Mom about not being rude.
âCan I get you something? Thereâs beer andââI glance aroundââbeer.â
She looks twice as uncomfortable as before. âThat would be perfect. I can just see the headline: FBI Agentâs Daughter Snagged in Underage-Drinking Sting Operation.â
Thereâs an attention getter. âYour dad works for the FBI?â
She nods, and I realize that itâs hanging right out there in front of me. The only way I could ever give my family the equivalent of a vending-machine moment.
Itâs as if an unseen force takes over, and I have absolutely no say in the matter. I grab Kendra by the shoulders and kiss her.
I donât knowâI still canât explain it. But Iâm really not expecting what happens next. Sheâs rigid for a second, and then she relaxes and kisses me back. I reflect that the history of my love life is pretty pathetic. I wasted my first make-out worrying about the body in my trunk, and hereâs number two coming off a near miss with a call girl, when the only thought in my head is âIn your face, Dad, Iâm kissing the FBI!â Dancers jostle us, full-to-overflowing beers whiz by our heads, but we donât come up for air for a long time.
Somewhere, a fight breaks out. Fists fly. I feel rather than hear the impact of knuckles on somebodyâs chin. The victim hurtles through the crush, bursting right between Kendra and me. The guy hits the floor in a shower of beer slop and bounces right up again, eager for battle. Instantly, three peacemakers materialize. The kidâs so mad that, in order to keep him from charging, the three have to drive him back, plowing through the crowd. Somehow, I get caught up in this wedge, stuck between the fighter and his buddies. The string of curses he spews right into my face would make Tommy blush, and, trust me, Dadâs business isnât exactly high tea at Buckingham Palace. There are angry shouts and screams as we bull right through a pack of dancers.
It all fizzles out soon enough, but when I make my way back to Kendra, sheâs gone. Frowning, I look around, navigating by the posters on the walls. She was definitely at the intersection of the Notre Dame football pennant and Miss February 1999. What happened?
Searching for a five-foot-two girl at a packed frat party is like trying to track down a lost Chihuahua in a mature cornfield. For the next hour, I push through every square inch of that loft, becoming more desperate with each passing minute. This is worse than the Angela
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