Strange Animals by Chad Kultgen Read Free Book Online

little too Christian for her, but he was extremely polite and she did find him attractive, so she chose to ignore his hard-line stance on sobriety.
    By the end of dinner, Beth was feeling the effects of her third Manhattan, and she asked James if he’d like to continue the date at a nearby bar. James was surprised to find that Beth’s insistence on drinking alcohol throughout dinner, and her suggestion to continue drinking alcohol at a bar, didn’t bother him that much. He always tried to remain neutral in matters of judgment where legal vices were concerned. He knew the social norms regarding alcohol dictated that Beth was doing nothing out of the ordinary, and it had been several months since he’d been on a date with a girl he found as charming as Beth.
    He knew that this was very likely a test from God, but he was confused as to what God might be testing. It seemed too obvious that God would test him to see if he could resist temptation. And because Beth never tried to get him to taste even a sip of her own drink, James thought a test of temptation was unlikely. It seemed more reasonable that God might be testing James to see just how accepting of others he could be, how willing he was to indulge in activities that were out of his comfort zone. After deciding that this second test was the one God had probably set before him, James agreed to accompany Beth to a nearby bar.
    Once in the bar, and halfway through her fourth Manhattan, Beth said, “So James, you seem like a pretty straightforward guy. You’re polite. You don’t seem like you’re too weird or anything. Why aren’t you married yet?”
    James explained that he had dated a few women who seemedlike likely candidates for marriage, but for one reason or another, things just ended up not working out.
    Beth said, “Does that make you sad at all?”
    James explained that it didn’t make him sad. He was confident in God’s plan for him, whatever that was, and he knew that when the time was right, God would bring him together with whoever he was supposed to marry. Beth said, “Who knows? Maybe that’s what God’s doing right now,” then leaned close to James and kissed him on the mouth.
    James was surprised at how forward she was, but it made sense, given how forward she’d been online. There was alcohol on her lips—the first time James had ever tasted it—and he began to wonder if his first inclination might have been correct. Maybe this was a test of temptation.
    Beth had one more Manhattan before she and James decided to leave. James walked her to her car, and they had a brief conversation about what a good time they each had and how they’d like to see each other again. As Beth was getting her keys from her purse, she stumbled, fell, and spilled everything in her purse onto the ground. She was very clearly drunk. She said, “Crap. I think I might be too drunk to drive home.”
    James offered to call her a taxi.
    Beth had a different suggestion. “You could just drive me home. I can leave my car here until morning.” Even if it was a test in temptation, as a Christian man, James knew he couldn’t leave a woman in need, so he agreed to drive her home.
    James followed the GPS directions to Beth’s apartment and tried to engage her in some small talk on the drive, but after a few blocks Beth passed out. James let her sleep until he pulled up to the address she’d programmed into his GPS. He put the car in park, turned off the engine, and gently nudged her until she woke up.
    Beth said, “Oh my god, did I seriously just pass out? I’m really sorry.”
    James explained that there was no need to apologize. As he helped her out of the car and walked her to her front door, he was surprised to find that Beth seemed more attractive to him in some way as a result of her inebriation. There was something in her needing his help that made him feel like he was